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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22866121">Human Stew</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanjcsy/pseuds/Nanners'>Nanners (nanjcsy)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Game of Thrones (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Addiction, Alternate Universe - Mental Institution, Body Modification, Breastfeeding, Bullying, Dark Comedy, Domestic Violence, Drama, Eating Disorders, Gregor is his own warning, I am my own warning, Implied/Referenced Incest, Incel - Freeform, Islands, Medication, Mental Health Issues, Mild Gore, Mild Thramsay, Multi, Not all pairings are sexual, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Ramsay is His Own Warning, Self-Mutilation, Sexual Abuse, Small Towns, Stalking, Twins, Unreliable Narrator, albinos, some horror</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 06:20:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>33,898</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22866121</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanjcsy/pseuds/Nanners</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A tiny coastal island can still treat mental health issues the same as a big city with one major expectation. Anonymity is much harder when every worker and patient is someone you know or will know someone that you know. Gregor leads us off with his anger management issues and off we go...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Cersei Lannister/Sansa Stark, Damon Dance-for-me/Theon Greyjoy, Gregor Clegane/Septa Unella, Lysa Tully Arryn/Petyr Baelish, Ramsay Bolton/Theon Greyjoy, Sansa Stark/Margaery Tyrell</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>505</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Managed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Let The Bodies Hit The Floor by Drowning Pool</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Shit. It happened again. Well, shit.</em>
</p><p>Gregor wiped the sweat from his forehead and looked about to assess the damage. Sandor was sitting on the pavement, it was clear his leg was broken, possibly in more than one place. That sucked, Sandor wouldn't be able to contribute and would have a great reason to sit on his ass and bitch. But his brother wasn't going to press charges against him and would eagerly accept the ride to the hospital, saying nothing.</p><p><em>But.</em> It wasn't just Sandor, no, it was way worse than just a family business leakage. Tywin Lannister's men scattered like confetti across the man's expanse of lawn. One man was half in the newly installed marble fountain, possibly drowning. Damn it, how could Gregor have lost his temper like that? No matter how hot it is or how stupid the other humans are around him, there was no excuse for it and he knew it.</p><p>Of course there were witnesses this time. Here was that little half a small whiskey, a drunken scowl already in place as the morning light shone upon his craggy face. Tyrion shook his head slowly as he melodramatically surveyed the damage around them.</p><p>"What perfect timing you always have, Clegane! This is the first time I have ever been so amused by you. The reason my father called you and your brother here, it was to help us escort my sister. She doesn't want to go where she's being sent. Now it looks like you might be taking the trip right along with her. This temper of yours is not normal, Gregor. Look at your poor brother! How many times have you nearly killed him because your temper just got the better of you? How would you feel if you killed him? Ah, here comes father and he's already frazzled. Your temper might be fearsome Gregor but my father's is the true stuff of legends. Tread softly if you want to be alive by this afternoon."</p><p>Gregor wished his temper flares would at least obey his commands. But he cannot summon them forth nor can he control them once they do pop up. Right now Tyrion was trying to explain to Dr. Qyburn why an ambulance or two was needed. Tywin was nearly in Gregor's face, his nose hairs quivering with extreme indignation. Every word was a bullet, the gaze was that of a prison warden facing a child murderer.</p><p>"I have bailed you out of jail, saved you from prison countless times, have I not? Did I not pay for you to take that specialized anger management retreat?"</p><p>Shuffling his feet slightly, Gregor muttered.</p><p>"Sir, it was run by a fire priestess that wanted us to all join her cult. We prayed to fire and danced, had lots of sex. There was no anger to manage."</p><p>"What about all those books? What about those classes with the author of Feeding Rage and those other books?"</p><p>"He died of anorexia, Sir. And his books only made me hungry, which pissed me off."</p><p>"I'm sorry, Gregor. This is it. I have warned you before about this. Now I am not having you arrested nor will I sue you since you are a good employee. But you will be joining my daughter in her journey to better mental health. A few nights inside and then a day program should set you both right. I will see to your brother while you are caring for yourself. When you are better you shall resume your work for me and you will pay me back for all damages. I am not asking you, Gregor, I am telling you this is what is going to happen."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Misunderstood</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"This isn't about how much wine you drink. It isn't about how much money you spend or even about how I think you are sleeping with half our staff."</p><p>"Oh, fuck you. You drink as much as whiskey as I drink wine. You are the one who bought a yacht and a personal helicopter! And how many mistresses do you have at current? Because I've heard you've been seen with at least three ladies. One of them is young enough to be your daughter. Hypocrite!"</p><p>Robert flushed and slammed a bloated fist onto a side table that shuddered under the weight.</p><p>"Damn it! I just SAID that those aren't the reasons why! I'm not trying to fix stupid shit and this isn't a punishment. You are sick, can't you see that? Can't you see how the kids look? Tommen's face looks like the boy's been walking through a war and Myrcella's face suggests she might be dying of something. Your favorite child, Joff, have you even noticed him at all? Don't you find that unusual for you, dear? You are done scaring the children and causing me embarrassment. Your father is finally seeing the light after all this time."</p><p>"I think it's hysterical that you've raged out and beat me yet no one called the police on you. I have a few temper tantrums and everyone overreacts! Maybe the family needs to read about menopause! Maybe you could all learn to be a bit more sensitive to my needs!"</p><p>"Cersei, this isn't just menopause! You spent Joff's college funds for a year on your damned procedures. Spas, surgeries, tucks, nips, mesh sewn onto your tongue so you can't eat of all things! Bleached, tanned, detoxed, purified, masked, removals, fillers, I never know what you'll look like next! Wrapped like a mummy, puffed up looking like a rotted banana or a stiff new face I barely recognize as my wife! When you aren't fixing your flesh you are draping it at great cost to my wallet! You forgot to pay the house staff twice in the month and couldn't be bothered to create a grocery list for the maid but you remembered to get new curtains for every damned window in the mansion!"</p><p>"So because I spent a little too much you are having me committed? What kind of husband are you? Have I not put up with your whores, with your drinking problems, your WEIGHT ISSUE? Regardless of how repugnant you are, I have stayed married to you, I have remained a good wife and mother to your children. This is the thanks I get for it. As soon as I get a little older and scattered, bam! Toss me out and do you have my replacement already picked out? I really hope it's not one of the whores. You could at least be that decent."</p><p>"You are irrational. Fine, you want a list of why? Sure. We will discuss it while I help you pack. Here are all your favorite underwear. Last week you chased after Myrcella with YOUR CAR and almost ran her over. Because you thought she was being very rude to you. SO YOU CHASED HER IN A CAR NEARLY RUNNING HER OVER. Does that sound normal to you? No, I am not folding your damned socks, just toss them in. A few weeks ago our butler had to call the police, do you recall why? Because you were assaulting our substitute pool boy because his humming bothered you. Don't snort at me, it was assault! You knocked him into the pool then tried to beat him with the pool cleaner!"</p><p>"I can't believe you LAUGHED when I threw that plate during supper tonight. Here, fold my jeans while I get my make up and lotions. Figures that my family would be what sets me off that final time. I still think if that plate had hit anyone else besides my father, he never would have sent me away. So it's just lucky for all of you, I guess. The fear and joy I felt when that plate glanced off my father's shoulder is a feeling I won't forget for a long, long time. Fine, I can use a few days away. I hope you all rot. What the hell is going on outside? Sounds like someone is being murdered on the front lawn!"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Numb</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Kid Fears by Indigo Girls</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"If you are hoping to get everyone's attention, you've got it. You can't just quit your university courses mid semester of your first year! To come home, leave your boxes sitting in your car and come to lay on this bed! You've been here for three days and I cannot imagine how you must stink. Get up, shower and eat something. Then come talk to us. Your poor father is worried sick. End this nonsense right now."</p><p>
  <em>She stared at the wall and said nothing. Watching the light grow stronger on the white painted wall, watching it grow dimmer and disappear. Why was this happening? Sansa wished she knew. In high school, Sansa was like royalty, she got excellent grades, she partied as hard as she worked and it was the best time of her life. So what happened?</em>
</p><p>"Sansa, love, if something happened, tell me, I will listen and help you any way I can. But laying there and staring at a wall until you turn to dust isn't going to fix anything. Your mother is worried sick and so am I. Please, tell us what happened. Was it a boy? Did a boy try something with you? Or did you maybe experiment with drinking or drugs? Was it a bad trip? You haven't eaten in days, this can't go on. Your mother is calling your slimy, sleazy, quack of a fake doctor-uncle."</p><p>
  <em>The mainland was hot, sticky, everyone laughed at Sansa's accent and it seemed like everyone was polished but her. That was hard enough but then schoolwork took care of any hope of a social life. College wasn't like high school and Sansa had trouble following along. The huge lecture halls intimidated her and Sansa struggled in silence for as long as she could. How did she go from smart to stupid, from graceful to clumsy and from popular to invisible?<br/>
</em>
</p><p>"Darling Sansa, look at you. I wish you'd called me but luckily your mother did. Did you forget that I was a mental health care worker? Silly of you. Well now, it looks like someone is having some trouble with major depression. A few days at the clinic and day hospital should be of some assistance. Actually her cousin is at the clinic now. Lysa brought him yesterday. Isn't that nice, Sansa? You'll have company. My poor stepson does try and so does Lysa. But both end up taking turns as frequent fliers at the clinic and the day hospital."</p><p>
  <em>Sansa had finally tried to seduce one of her professors out of desperation. It not only was rebuffed but the shriveled jerk threatened to tell everyone and have her suspended. Unable to handle such a thing, Sansa fled. She packed her stuff before her roommate returned from class and headed home. There was no plan or goal past reaching home and her bed. Once that goal was reached, Sansa has shut off. She has only left the bed to use the bathroom. Food holds no interest, she only drinks water if her throat starts to hurt.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sansa didn't even care much that she was being forced up and onto a stretcher.</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Frequent Fliers</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Basket Case by Green Day</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!</strong>
</p><p>Alliser was ready to rip the hair out of his head.</p><p>
  <strong>THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!</strong>
</p><p>"Did someone call over to psych yet? Tell them we have several evaluations and a few frequent fliers that needs to get the FUCK out of my cage!"</p><p>The island has no shortage of those in need of mental health but same as the bigger areas, sometimes the police are what the mentally ill get instead. Alliser hated dealing with nutcases most of all.</p><p>He would be more comfortable interrogating a child murderer or researching the sudden disappearance of a teenager. Today has been almost entirely nutcases and Alliser cannot wait for his shift to end in twenty minutes. It felt like forever.</p><p>
  <strong>THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!</strong>
</p><p>Alliser accidentally broke the pen in half in his hands and tossed the pieces on the desk, swearing.</p><p>"Dammit, someone make that asshole stop slamming into the cell bars! Roose Bolton comes in with a fancy lawyer and sees Damon covered in bruises shaped like bars...dammit! I am NOT going down for imagined police brutality! Don't we have a sedation rifle somewhere in here? Find it!"</p><p>Jon and Sam silently searched for the rifle. Alliser ripped it from Jon as soon as the deputy found it.</p><p>"Thank you. It's about time. That took you ten minutes longer than it should have."</p><p>
  <strong>THWACK! THWACK! </strong>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>THUD.</strong> </em>
</p><p>Alliser nearly cried in relief as he put away the sedation rifle. Sure, he will probably get in a bit of trouble for using such a drastic method but have they seen the size of that boy? At a mere twenty two years of age, Damon was a not so gentle giant.</p><p>He looked like a viking fresh off the cover of some cheesy romance novel. Alliser knows this because earlier another guard pointed it out and that's when Damon started slamming himself into the bars.</p><p>Alliser took a first sip of his now lukewarm coffee and leaned back in his chair slowly.</p><p>
  <strong>SMASH! SMASH! SMASH!</strong>
</p><p>"Are you shitting me? Dammit, Ramsay, knock it off! Damon's taking a little nap, why don't you? I'll get the rifle, see if I don't! Fine, that's how you want it to go down. You can wake up with your demented buddy in the damned crazy unit!"</p><p>Alliser practically ran to unlock the cabinet and reload the sedation rifle. Jeyne was kind enough to hold it for him while he awkwardly loaded it.</p><p>"Thank you, dear. Now, I just need to go sedate that crashing moron then I will be back to help you, Miss."</p><p>Smiling brightly, Jeyne nodded and stepped back to allow Alliser past her. He hardly felt the gun slip out of his hands and into her small but capable ones. </p><p>"Did you already forget who I am, Officer? I'm Jeyne. I have been in your jail cell almost all day and it got very boring. I let myself out. I will wait for the doctor out here, please. It's too loud back there."</p><p>"Fuck. A. Duck."</p><p>Jeyne giggled.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Special Bus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>You Know My Name(Look Up The Number) by The Beatles</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The white bus pulled up to the local jailhouse and let out a quick beep to announce their presence. Harold and Bob made sure they had their utility belts secure and full.</p><p>Being albino twins on a small island meant that everyone knew them.  </p><p>Both men took a quick moment after making sure they had all their equipment, to check their personal appearances. Mirrored glasses protected pink eyes and a quick pump of breath freshener took care of anything beyond their gleaming chiclet teeth.</p><p>Harold used a tiny brush to straighten out his full mustache as he sniffed dismissively at Bob's bare nose and lips. Bob made a show of running his hand through his full long thick white hair that fell to his shoulders. Harold chuffed as he patted protectively at his shorter eighties style permed white head.</p><p>Harold favored the actor from that old Baywatch show, the same actor that did a show about a talking car. His hair was styled after that actor and he was damned proud of it. His mustache only could enhance the look.</p><p>Bob and Harold studied each other's outfits for any stains, rips or stray threads. Their nursing shoes gleamed dully, ironed and clean scrubs, purple for Harold and blue for Bob. They carefully pulled on latex gloves before grabbing their clipboards and heading for the police station.</p><p>They entered together and paused, tilting their heads and surveying the mess around them. Bob spoke first.</p><p>"Let's see. Chief Alliser, Detective Sam and Deputy Jon are all sedated. All lined up nicely with rolled clothing under their heads. Nice touch. This is the work of little Jeyne Poole. No doubt. If this were Ramsay, they'd be skinned and if it were Damon, they'd be stomped or whipped. Only Jeyne would injure and pamper all in the same breath."</p><p>Harold nodded in agreement and started to slowly walk forward, keeping an eye for Jeyne or the boys.</p><p>"Jeyne? It's time to visit the clinic, remember? We came to get you just like we always do. It's a busy night, lovey and we have many other stops to make. Let's go and bring the boys, would you? Don't make us do the dance tonight, Jeyne, please?"</p><p>A hard scrabbling sound then a sound like a cat strangling before the rifle came flying at them. They dove just in time as the rifle scope shattered off upon impact of the edge of the wall. Harold saw two pale hands scratching hard along the wall, a nail partially off.</p><p>"Jeyne, it's hard to suddenly stop, isn't it? I know. Can you try? I think if you really try you can cooperate. Without losing all your nails, okay?"</p><p>The hand gritted down the cement wall so hard that two nails ripped off and Bob sighed heavily. It was going to be another difficult extraction. Jeyne hadn't bothered to release the men so they just had to chase her down.</p><p>It took about twenty minutes to take Jeyne down and give her a quick needle full of sedative. Once Jeyne was singing about rainbows while strapped into her seat, the twins went to get the guys.</p><p>Standing in front of the bars that held the young men, they raised their eyebrows.</p><p>"It's clinic time, gentlemen. Jeyne is already strapped in and waiting. Shall we do this the easy or the hard way?"</p><p>The answer was clear and the twins reached for their utility belts as they watched the bars slide open, releasing Damon and Ramsay.</p><p>"Hard way, it is, I guess."</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Trippin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Moving Right Along by The Muppet Movie<br/>Axel F by Beverly Hills Cop Movie Soundtrack</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The twins smiled brightly at their strapped down passengers. Bob consulted his clipboard while Harold double checked names, dates and tightened seat belts and restraints.</p><p>"Jeyne, you look somewhat coherent again. How are you feeling, dear?"</p><p>"Better. I got hearing back in my right eye and I can smell colors but they all still sound like coffee. I feel kind of sad though. Will you play some music for me?"</p><p>"I sure will, don't I always? You just rest and the clinic will make you feel better soon enough. We only have a few more stops. You just groove out to the music and we'll get there in one piece, okay? Great. Axel F for Jeyne, Bob!"</p><p>Ramsay and Damon twitched as Harold checked their straps. Ramsay spit and Damon swore but Harold spoke to them both in the voice of an overly chummy school teacher.</p><p>"Sorry we had to keep using the cattle prods on you but we aren't taking chances with your kind of ultra violence, gentlemen. If you start to feel antsy, let us know and we can try sedation instead of high voltage, if you'd like."</p><p>Gregor was heavily sedated and wearing a tight straitjacket. He was sporting twice the amount of straps as everyone else and the only thing he could move in his seat was his head. Giving a dreamy look to Harold, Gregor huskily spoke in a too slow monotone voice.</p><p>"I am going to rip out your internal organs."</p><p>Across from Gregor sat Cersei, composed but angry in the same straps Jeyne wore.</p><p>"Mrs. Baratheon, thank you for being so cooperative. A few more stops and we will be at the clinic. Can I get you some water, a blanket or a song request?"</p><p>Cersei smiled charmingly at Harold then used her most cultured tone to explain fifty ways he could go fuck himself. Harold nodded and walked up front to his seat. Bob buckled himself into the driver seat and the bus roared to life.</p><p>"Our next stop is the Greyjoy estate. According to Balon Greyjoy, his son is hiding under the porch waiting for his extraction. Then we must give a quick visit to Olenna's home, though it was unclear which twin we were picking up. Might have been both."</p><p>Harold blinked at Bob's words and consulted his clipboard.</p><p>"Both twins? It says both names here. And we are also stopping at Petyr's house to round up his wife. His step son is already at the clinic, we got him yesterday, I believe. Strange. The last stop is the most interesting one of all, I would think. Who would have thought that Detective Stannis Baratheon would have cracked like an egg? I always thought it was his wife that visited our bus and clinic."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Served</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Die Hard The Hunter by Def Leppard<br/>Everything's Not Awesome by The LEGO Movie 2</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"He's under there, under my porch, the fucking pussy! Can't take a punch from his old man, can't serve his country, can't do anything but drink, drug and fuck! Get him out of here! This is the last time! I told him! For years I had child services, truant officers, police and now the fucking funny farm on my lawn over his ass! I am done! Theon, you hear me? Don't bother coming home afterwards this time! It's not illegal, you aren't a minor anymore, stay away!"</p><p>Harold and Bob smiled winningly at Balon before walking over to the porch where Yara was trying to coax Theon out.</p><p>"My little brother's therapist says it is PTSD, anxiety disorder and addiction issues all rolled into one. I'm not sure he even understands what's happening."</p><p>Bob leaned under the porch to see large blue eyes with pupils blown out due to fear and drugs.</p><p>"Hey, Theon. Want some help coming out of there? Let's leave your asshole dad and go somewhere that understands you, okay?"</p><p>An explosion of leaves and dirt smacked Bob in the face as Theon exploded out of the tiny space in pure terror and drug fueled adrenaline. Theon knocked over his sister and ran directly into his father's screaming figure. Balon's hollering turned into gasping as he found himself holding four broken ribs, plastered against the side of his house.</p><p>Harold tackled the slight figure just as Theon began to pull a weapon from his jacket. After relieving Theon of his butter knife, the twins carried the twitching young man onto the bus. Theon saved his kicks and punches until the two men tried to strap him into a bus seat.</p><p>"Fuck you! Let me go! I was in the military, I fought for your country and this is how you treat me?"</p><p>Theon's indignation was ruined by Ramsay hollering "BOO!" which caused the nervous soldier to piss himself and burst into tears.</p><p> </p><p>Olenna stamped her cane as she urged the twins forth towards Bob and Harold.</p><p>"My twinkling stars have dimmed. Loras and Marge need to spend some time getting their heads out of their asses. They are suffering extreme depression which is absurd considering their lifestyles. Petyr and I have decided this is the only way. I will see you both at work later on. I despise dramatics unless I am in the mood which I am not yet. Loras! Marge! Your bus is here and I don't mean your school bus!"</p><p>The twins stared at the twins awkwardly. Olenna poured herself a cup of tea and spoke into the tense silence.</p><p>"It is abnormal to spend your senior year of high school so depressed. You go to a private school with some of the richest and loveliest children ever to have been born. You two are rich and spoiled and beautiful! Depressed? Why?"</p><p>The elderly woman ignored the two children as they both opened their mouths as if to answer her. Olenna turned to Bob and Harold while waving her hand behind her to indicate the granchildren.</p><p>"Both of them have eating disorders, shattering self esteem issues and that's all normal for a Tyrell. But Loras is threatening to quit school to elope with Renly Baratheon, that broke justice warrior that is an ADULT and Marge has been indulging in some self mutilation. Can you imagine this lovely skin being burned, blistered and even stapled?"  </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Awkward Conversations</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Any Way You Want It by Journey<br/>The Distance by Cake</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lysa was sitting on the edge of the curb when the bus pulled up. Struggling to lift the three piece luggage set, Lysa growled at Harold as he stepped off the bus.</p><p>"Lysa. Haven't we discussed this before? You can't use your husband's position and your son's illness as an excuse to spend the night at our facility as if it were a hotel. And you could have waited in your home. It's a large fancy house, why wait out here in the cold?"</p><p>Cersei snorted as she stared out her little window at Lysa's dilated insane eyes.</p><p>"That woman is crazier than the whole damn bus put together. She's been that way since grade school. About time someone decided to help out Lysa. Too bad that sleaze of a husband doesn't intend on helping her but putting her and her loony kid away so he can enjoy their fortune in peace."</p><p>Bob hushed Cersei as he headed off the bus.</p><p>"I demand you take me to my son and husband immediately! They NEED me!"</p><p>The twins moved fast to get the woman onto the bus and into a strapped seat. Bob spoke in a cheerful tone.</p><p>"Lysa, thank you for being so cooperative today. Now let's hope when Robin goes home, you go with him. One more stop left, folks!"</p><p>"OF COURSE I WILL GO HOME WHEN MY SON DOES! AND WHY MAKE ANOTHER STOP? MY FAMILY NEEDS ME, HURRY UP!"</p><p> </p><p>Stannis sat stiffly on a kitchen stool, watching out the window for the bus. A tendril of smoke grew thicker and stronger as his former mistress entered the room. Chanting to a fire god while waving around incense, the redheaded priestess hoped to use religion to make Stannis saner. It didn't seem to be working and Stannis coughed.</p><p>"That stuff stinks. It can't be healthy for Shireen to breathe that in all the time. Put it out and go away."</p><p>Seylse sighed and paced as Melisande left the room irritated.</p><p>"You brought her home, get me into the religion and now you are bored of her. Too bad, I like her, I believe in her god and I might even love her. How do you react? You run away to a funny farm. Nice. Leave me with our freakish daughter and your former mistress. I still love you and Shireen worships you. And Melisande still has feelings for you. Stay with us, work this out with all of us, don't run away. Is this about that student? I told you to have the affair if you want to, I don't mind. Stannis, where are you going?"</p><p>Stannis grabbed his wife's shoulders when she blocked him from going to leave the house.</p><p>"Does it bother you that we had an arranged marriage? Because it bothers me. Does it bother you that you seem to despise our daughter. Because that bothers me. Does it bother you that you've fallen in love with my former mistress? It bothers me. I need to get my head on straight and you should do the same."</p><p>Shoving her away from him, Stannis nearly ran out the door. He didn't breathe until he heard the door shut behind him. Grimacing, Stannis noticed that Shireen had been sitting in front of the open window. The little girl was clutching a stuffed animal that he didn't recognize.</p><p>"Where did you get that from?"</p><p>Damn, Stannis cursed himself, he didn't' mean to sound so gruff with the girl.</p><p>"Uncle Davos gave it to me, it's a deer. How long will you be gone for?"</p><p>"Davos is a family friend, not your uncle. Renly is your uncle. I should only be gone three to four nights. Then I will spend a few weeks only going to the hospital during the day."</p><p>"Oh. Okay. Um. Is it true? Are you going to the hospital because of the student that wants to have sex with you?"</p><p>"This is not appropriate to discuss. I will miss you and I love you. Oh, the bus is here!"</p><p>Stannis handed Harold his suitcase and he felt Bob shut and lock the bus doors behind him.</p><p>"Welcome to the first day of your better mental health, Detective Baratheon! Please, go take a seat and Harold will get you all tucked in."</p><p>He turned gratefully and stopped dead upon seeing Cersei staring at him. Groaning, Stannis tried to get past her and that's when he saw Sansa. The girl was growing redder by the second and Stannis spun around, trying to get off the bus.</p><p>"No. I've changed my mind. I signed myself up for this and now I have decided to undo it. Let me off the bus, please."</p><p>"Sorry, Professor but it doesn't work that way. You can discuss this with one of the doctors at the clinic when we get there. Please get in a seat now."</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Welcome Home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Lay Your Hands On Me by Bon Jovi<br/>Keeps Gettin' Better by Christina Aguilera</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"My mother is coming today."</p><p>"Yes, we all know that, Robin. But is not what we are discussing, is it? We are saying goodbye to those going leaving our full time program. Hodor and Walda are going into the day program now and we are happy for them. Are you happy for them, Robin?"</p><p>Shrugging, Robing peered up at Counselor Sparrow mulishly.</p><p>"Hodor won't let me ride him and Walda won't let me bounce on her like a trampoline so why do I care about them? My mother is coming and that is something interesting. I miss her. Daddy Petyr won't cuddle or snuggle me like she will."</p><p>Unella leaned forward to admonish the slightly drool stricken boy.</p><p>"Please do not refer to the Counselor Petyr as Daddy in front of anyone but him."</p><p>"Okay but Unella, did I tell you my mother was coming today?"</p><p>"Yes, Robin, you did. Several times. I am going to put you on bathroom cleaning duty if you say it one more time."</p><p>Hodor and Walda looked on sadly as Robin rolled across the floor trying to hold his mouth shut.</p><p>"Hodor!"</p><p>"I agree with my companion. We are waiting on that cake we've been staring at all day! It's time we got on with the singing and eating of the cake, please!"</p><p>Petyr smirked and strolled forth with a platter holding the Oreo cookie cake. As he passed Unella he invited her to perform an illegal act upon herself. Then he invited the rest of the room to join him in singing a farewell song to Hodor and Walda.</p><p>"MY MOTHER IS COMING TODAY!"</p><p>The elevator doors slid open to reveal the sight of Unella dragging a screaming Robin towards his punishment of chopping onions for their supper.</p><p>"OH MY BABY BOY, ROBIN, WHAT IS THAT OGRESS DOING TO YOU? MAMA IS COMING TO SAVE YOU!"</p><p>Lysa flew out of the elevator and onto the floor, arms outstretched, her face in a grimace of love. Robin was trying to use Unella's face as a spring board to launch into his mother's arms.</p><p>Bob and Harold found themselves actually skidding along unable to stop the slight but maddened mother bear heading for her threatened cub. Petyr had to stifle his laughter but was smart enough to keep his distance. He wasn't dumb enough to get between <em>this</em> mother and child.</p><p>Counselor Sparrow decided to end the whole thing by grabbing a hold of Robin. This caused the boy to shriek in a voice that could wake the dead and his mother reacted by going nuclear.</p><p>The rest of the room reacted in great dismay as the tall thin Sparrow was thrown head first into the farewell cake.</p><p>"HODOR!"</p><p>"I agree, Hodor! They <em>are </em>the rudest, crudest nastiest filthiest curs <em>ever</em> to exist upon this cursed planet! And<em> yes</em>, I agree that we should be allowed to <em><strong>murder</strong></em> them!"</p><p>Everyone<em> heard</em> Walda say that but it was her bad luck that Doctors Pycelle and Qyburn entered the room in time to <em>see</em> her attack Lysa. This gave Cersei time to undo Gregor's straitjacket. Sansa was impressed that Cersei seemed to know exactly who to pick sides with.</p><p>Gregor wasn't handsome or rich but Cersei was all about helping him.</p><p>"Go forth and have a temper flare, if you please, Gregor."</p><p>Gregor has never been able to command his rage before and he doubted Cersei could either. However, enough indignity has happened and that did trigger his rage. With a roar, he burst forth like the incredible hulk and crashed into the albino twins, narrowly missing Lysa.</p><p>The violence was too much for Ramsay and Damon to bear and they came shrieking out of the elevator to join in the melee. Pycelle cried out in pain as Damon landed on him with both socked feet. Ramsay was laughing like a hyena as he hurtled into Petyr and Dr. Qyburn.</p><p>Cersei strolled into the hallway and found herself a good seat to watch everything from. Sansa and Marge followed behind her, sat after she did. Theon had pressed hard into the elevator walls until Loras touched his shoulder.</p><p>Then he shrieked and ran from the elevator only to encounter far too many strangers. Mute and pale with terror, Theon fell boneless and crawled his way down the hallway. Loras started to giggle unable to help himself due to nerves and that somehow set Jeyne off.</p><p>Loras seemed shocked when Jeyne lifted him up but Walda looked truly surprised when Jeyne hit her with him.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Seer Sucker</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Barbie Girl by Aqua<br/>Everything She Wants by Wham</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Stannis decided he needed a course of action and that alone brought a sense of momentary calmness. He followed through with what he felt he could handle best which was Theon. Having been in the military himself, Stannis understood a bit of what Theon might be going through.</p><p>Approaching slowly and quietly, Stannis spoke gently but in a low firm tone. He spoke even as he crouched down low and extended one hand towards the crawling man.</p><p>"It's all clear, Greyjoy. At ease, son. No one is trying to hurt you here and things will get calmer in just a minute. You are in no immediate danger."</p><p>Theon blinked away tears in his eyes and gave a brief tilt of his head as his voice choked out past a lump in his throat.</p><p>"Thanks, man. Its not a real bad one, I mean, I can hear and see you. Just really startled me is all. And these days, I startle real easy."</p><p>Stannis gave a thin shoulder a very brief pat then regretted it when he saw Theon freeze. Cursing himself silently for going too fast, Stannis moved back slightly. At that exact moment it registered to Stannis that Theon's eyes weren't on him, they were just above his crouched form.</p><p>With a mounting nameless dread, Stannis turned his neck and looked up. Seeing the wizened mummy encased in an old fashioned rayon nurse's outfit was all his overly stressed mind could take and it snapped.</p><p>Fear sucked away gravity from Stannis the way moisture has been sucked out of the nurse's skin. Stannis was embarrassed to find himself in Theon's lap. The landing seemed to unlock Theon's voice box again.</p><p>"AH! MUMMY! MUMMY NURSE!"</p><p>Wincing, Stannis clapped his hands to his ears positive he was deafened. He was sure pools of blood must be filling his palms.</p><p>"DAMN YOU, BOY! DON'T BE ABSURD! THAT IS NO MUMMY, IT'S A ZOMBIE!"</p><p>The ancient nurse reached for him and Stannis found himself doing the unimaginable.</p><p>"RETREAT!"</p><p>Jaw dropping in surprise, Barbary watched Stannis and Theon crawl away from her.</p><p>Petyr stared about at the carnage then he focused hard upon his wife. Using a bruising grip, he yanked her towards him as he hissed angrily, eyes narrowed dangerously. </p><p>"Your cloying behavior has almost cost you your son. Do you want to see if it can destroy our marriage too? You asked for my help with your son and I gave it whether you liked how I did it is immaterial. I am fine with treating you here, my dear but you will learn to abide by my rules here. I do not have to put up with your revolting actions here!"</p><p>Robin slammed his feet on the ground and hollered.</p><p>"BUT I LIKE TO SUCK MILK! I'M A GOOD BOY AND WANT TO NURSE!"</p><p>Petyr rounded on the boy and seemed to only stop himself from hitting the boy at the last second.</p><p>"We have discussed this, Robin. No more milk except from a jug and a glass. Remember?"</p><p>Robin wasn't used to seeing his step father looking so menacing and he burst into tears.</p><p>"MA! MAMA! PETYR IS BEING MEAN TO ME! PETYR WON'T LET ME NURSE!"</p><p>The only two loves of her life were both looking to her for instant approval and agreement which was impossible. Cersei, Sansa and Marge all tittered behind their hands at that. Unella has managed to recover enough to glare at the ladies with extreme censure.</p><p>"Nice to see a group of ladies for once. Too bad they are all mean girls."</p><p>Cersei gave a tiny smile full of poison and a tart response.</p><p>"Says the woman that looks like she just climbed out of a Jane Austen novel."</p><p>Unella gave a short bark of laughter.</p><p>"That was a compliment."</p><p>"It wasn't meant to be."</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Perverts, Ninjas and Eunuchs, Oh My!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Attention Please by Caroline Spine</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cersei, Sansa and Marge hid laughter behind demure hands and watched the chaos growing around them. A few subtle clues came along to let them know that there might be a few more patients on the floor.</p><p>A major clue was the pudgy man that kept trying to lick their legs no matter how hard they kicked at him. Wiggling thick unruly eyebrows at them, the man gruffly announced he was willing to carry their children in his alien egg sacs.</p><p>And that's how the ladies met Meryn Trant, a recent very dishonorable discharge from military services.</p><p>Cersei offered a winning smile to the pervert and spoke in honeyed tones to him.</p><p>"How distinctly unpleasant to make your acquaintance, Sir. If you ever lick me again, I'll castrate you with whatever rusty implement I can find. Or I will hire Gregor to chew your delicate squishy bits off."</p><p>"Sexy cougar lady, I want to have your baby!"</p><p>"I wouldn't let you have my abortion. Begone, troll!"</p><p>Sansa was half smitten by the thought of Cersei wielding rusty castration devices but then she saw a more entertaining sight.</p><p>Marge cleared her throat delicately before leaning slightly closer to the other ladies.</p><p>"I don't normally hallucinate but these days haven't been my best, so I'll ask...anyone else seeing the walking trashcan?"</p><p>A moment of brief silence amid the melee as the ladies tried to understand what they were seeing. Cersei's eyes lit with a mild sadistic interest and her voice was low and waspish.</p><p>"I have seen many kinds of fashion in my day but girls, I don't recall this one, do you? That man seems to have glued trash to his sweatsuit then wrapped it all up in a trash bag. Does....does he think he's sneaking? I can't...it's too much."</p><p>They watched as the stoic faced man slid along the wall in a very noticeable fashion before diving into a full trash barrel.</p><p>"His name is Jaqen and he thinks he's a ninja."</p><p>All three females jumped in the air at the sudden appearance of Varys next to them. His sweet voice and calm doughy demeanor didn't set them at ease but rather heightened their worry of the strange island eunuch.</p><p>Giving them a sickening understanding smirk, Varys shrugged and spread out his hands.</p><p>"Nothing to fear, ladies. Just another counselor here to serve you, my nonexistent parts play no part in your healing. Considering how many women I have heard tell me they view a penis as a weapon, I find it hysterical that my lack of a flesh weapon is what scares females the most." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Supper With Friends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Done by The Band Perry</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Unella's bandage on her nose was startlingly white and Gregor couldn't seem to look away from it. Her voice had a nasal duck sound to it and her eyes were shadowed by bruising and pain. For some reason this has rendered Unella attractive in Gregor's eyes and he resented that deeply.</p><p>It took until suppertime to restore order and treat all who were attacked in the earlier riot. Jeyne, Damon, Gregor and Ramsay all ended up needing to be cold packed and sedated for three hours. Loras suffered body contusions, Walda had a concussion, Pycelle had several cracked ribs.</p><p>Qyburn had a sprained right ankle and all the rest of the staff sported various degrees of bruising. Though Stannis and Theon remained physically uninjured, they were clearly in need of sedation. Cersei, Sansa and Marge were simply shown to their rooms and had their doors shut behind them.</p><p>Cersei was livid that she had to sit for hours in that dingy room waiting for her luggage to show up. When it finally did, half of what she brought was missing.</p><p>There was no one to listen to her complaints, due to injuries or at least that is what was told to Cersei. This was not acceptable.</p><p>If they thought such shabby service would be ignored they had another thing coming. Or at least that's what the cool blonde informed all of them as they were all herded together for supper.</p><p>Unella ignored Cersei threats and Gregor's misplaced rage. Standing before the steam table, she waited as the room slowly filled with clients.</p><p>Folding her hands on her stomach, Unella calmly began to speak.</p><p>"Due to the earlier excitement some of our usual protocols were skipped. So let this suffice as our welcome and your quick tutorial of your stay here. If you received your items and things were missing, they were probably confiscated for your safety. Feel free to bring it up with your counselor. Please do not mistake this clinic for a hotel. You will keep your room neat and tidy and you will adhere to all the rules in your handbooks."</p><p>Jeyne tilted her head and muttered to herself.</p><p>"There were handbooks?"</p><p>Unella closed her eyes briefly for patience. In the voice of a long suffering saint, she asked Jeyne a question she already seemed to know the answer to.</p><p>"You ate the handbook again, didn't you, Jeyne? That will play hell on your insides, young lady."</p><p>"UNELLA! NURSE UNELLA, GUESS WHO'S HERE? GUESS? IT'S MY MOTHER, NURSE UNELLA! MY MOTHER IS HERE AND I WISH TO NURSE NOT EAT FOOD!"</p><p>Lysa bared her breasts for her son and Meryn started to make a humming sound as he dreamily pulled down his sweatpants. This prompted Theon into speaking fast.</p><p>"Excuse me, nurse? I don't mean to interrupt you but I was wondering if you could hurry it up? Meryn looks like he's thinking of fucking the meatloaf."</p><p>Unella turned a thunderous expression upon Meryn and a voice shook as if from the very heavens.</p><p>"DON'T YOU DARE COPULATE WITH THAT MEATLOAF!"</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Fight Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Foil by Weird Al Yankovic</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Small tables were scattered all over the open space next to the kitchen nook. Only a steam-table separated Unella from her charges and she wielded a ladle as if it were a weapon.</p><p>"Starting tomorrow we shall resume our normal routine. Everyone here pitches in for cooking and cleaning. Clients are responsible for their own laundry and the cleanliness of their rooms. All clients assist in the general upkeep and food services as part of therapy. You'll find some light garden work outside to be beneficial as well."</p><p>Marge smiled.</p><p>"How exciting. But I have rather severe allergies. I cannot bear to be near a flower."</p><p>Unella gave a small understanding nod.</p><p>"I see. Luckily, we also have a vegetable garden, an herb garden and a small fruit grove as well. I'm sure we can find the right gardening chore for you. Unless you want to be on outside clean up crew? Gutters, sewer and such?"</p><p>"Fight me."</p><p>Unella blinked.</p><p>"Pardon me?"</p><p>Marge shrugged and shook her head fast. Cersei gave a demur murmur of her throat and pointedly looked at Jeyne. The tiny girl that was literally swaying under the weight of her curly uncombed hair, was glaring at Gregor's back and softly inviting it to fight her.</p><p>Cersei tapped a long fingernail softly upon Jeyne's nose and spoke in the same tone she used this year when she gave a speech at the Special Olympics.</p><p>"Bless your heart, aren't you just something special? It's nice to see hope like that in a place like this. You sparkle onward, you glitter wearing, sticker licking Princess Headgear but please don't antagonize my friend. He has enough troubles and I don't want him getting indigestion from eating you."</p><p>Jeyne giggled.</p><p>"You talk strange."</p><p>"Well, Jeyne, I may <em>talk</em> strange but you <em>are</em> strange."</p><p>Gregor gave Cersei a brief look of thanks before he went back to staring at Unella. He wanted to demand that she get her nose fixed, take a pill, go home, go away. How was he ever going to get well with distractions like this puritan slut?</p><p>"First of all, you said that out loud, Mr. Clegane. And second, how exactly does one become a puritan slut? How does that work?"</p><p>Qyburn admonished Unella for provoking the clients and she stared in hurt rebuke at the elderly doctor. </p><p>"We aren't going to address the way he's acting towards his own counselor? You think his attitude should be allowed to continue, Doctor?"</p><p>"You will not act like the man is in prison, you will remember that he is ill. Recall that part of your training, Unella?"</p><p>Nodding, Unella walked away fast, her face set in angry lines. Qyburn sighed but let her go. </p>
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<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Dinner Discussions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Be Our Guest by Beauty And The Beast.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Lysa bared her breasts, Meryn went from ecstatic to horrified in second. Robin seemed to dislocate his jaw and sucked a large droopy breast into his mouth as if to swallow it. A sweaty pudgy hand started to grope the free breast and that's when Meryn nearly burst into tears.</p><p>"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR BREAST, WOMAN? ITS LIKE RAWHIDE!"</p><p>Lysa's indignant squawk could be heard killing wildlife for miles.</p><p>"IT'S A FOOD BREAST! NOT A SEX BREAST!"</p><p>Ramsay leaned over the ruined flesh and studied it.</p><p>"I have never seen a fully callused breast before. Damn. Is your baby daddy a barracuda?"</p><p>Jeyne spoke in a stage whisper rather juicily into Cersei's ear, causing the cool blond to visibly wince.</p><p>"I don't think Lysa's breasts were ever sex breasts."</p><p>Sansa smiled behind her hand.</p><p>"My aunt and cousin are rather strange. But I suppose none of us are normal right now. I am still not sure which is less appealing. My aunt's tough breast or the meatloaf."</p><p>Cersei smirked.</p><p>"Little dove, I have known Lysa since she was in grade school. She's always been insane. Cat was always cold and Lysa was always crazy. I guess I was the bitch of our group. We weren't friends but we were in the same social class so we were sort of forced together. Lucky for you, all your looks come from your father. With any luck you'll have his looks and her brains."</p><p>"LYSA!"</p><p>The woman jumped a mile and Robin released the breast with a slurp upon hearing Petyr's hiss from down the hall. Petyr came forth like a rabid alley cat, hissing and foaming at the mouth, stalking forth on stiff legs.</p><p>"What did I tell you earlier? I don't think either of you are taking me very seriously. That would be a grave mistake. We are going to make a healthy family unit if I have to kill the both of you to do it. The fact that we all live here together was part of the appeal to this job. I knew I would need the help of every mental health professional I can get. You and your fortune are worth it, my love."</p><p>Raising his eyebrow at Petyr sitting in between his step son and his wife, Theon questioned.</p><p>"Uh, does the staff sit with us while we eat and everything? I mean, I think I am safe with the meatloaf. Maybe."</p><p>Qyburn started to serve meatloaf to everyone.</p><p>"In this facility the staff lives on grounds. We eat and live right along with you."</p><p>Loras twirled his spoon through the tapioca pudding and gagged.</p><p>"Is this meal sponsored by Polident Lite or something? Meatloaf, pudding, applesauce, peach cobbler and mashed potatoes with gravy. All spoon food."</p>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Food Fight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Jacknife Johnny by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Put on the sweatshirt, Lysa. If you pull out a breast again, I am putting you in a straitjacket."</p><p>"Petyr, love of my life, why are you acting so cruel to us? And shaming us in front of all these...others."</p><p>"Mama, if I can't have your milk, I want soda! I WANT SO-"</p><p>SMACK!</p><p>"ENOUGH, ROBIN!"</p><p>"PETYR! OH MY GOD, MY SON'S BEEN WOUNDED! YOU COULD HAVE BROKEN HIS HAND SLAPPING IT LIKE THAT!"</p><p>"MAMA! WHY DOES DADDY PETYR WANT TO HURT ME? MY HAND! HE BROKE MY HAND!"</p><p>Theon slumped down low and dragged his spoon through gummy mashed potatoes. He sat across from Petyr's little terse family situation and pretended to be deaf and blind.He tried to pretend that Ramsay wasn't staring at him.</p><p>He was in equal parts fascinated and repulsed by Ramsay. This wasn't a thought worth examine, being mentally ill is the worst time to date. Theon already had a cactus and a fish die on him. The best idea was to keep his distance and just concentrate on getting well. </p><p>Fumbling to open a small carton of milk, Theon swore in frustration. Stannis sat next to Theon at his little table and they pretended not to hear the drama together. Without saying anything, Stannis opened Theon's milk. Thanking him softly, Theon drank his milk.</p><p>Theon nervously peeked around the cafeteria. Blank whitish walls with grey borders, a perfectly square room with a set of barred windows. A cluster of small grey tables and some larger serving tables completes the entire room.</p><p>The whole place was one long square and Theon's already been through it looking for escape.</p><p>A sudden warm wet plop fell half on Theon's head and half on his tray of food. Ramsay grinned and prepared another cannon of mashed potatoes. Damon guffawed and tossed a small buttered bun at him, hitting Stannis instead.</p><p>"Oh, hey, sorry Gramps! Just toss that bun at the loser next to you for me! The battle weary solider, the local handsome little hero, right? Yeah? Hey, guess what, Greyjoy? I KNOW YOU. Yeah, small island we ALL know each other but I think you know what I mean! What's really eating you, what's your PTSD really about, huh? Ain't it great I'll be here to see you fucking unravel and admit to what you've done! Piece of shit!"</p><p>Ramsay barely managed to stop Damon from lunging. Theon was half out of his own chair, ready to run for his life from the angry blonde man. Instead of obeying Theon's command to flee, his body chose to fight.</p><p>"What is your fucking issue with me? You don't like the military? Fine! Who cares? WHY DO YOU WANT ME TO UNRAVEL, HUH? WHAT DO YOU KNOW? WHAT WHAT HOW DARE YOU EVEN SAY THAT TO ME?"</p><p>Harold and Bob set down their trays of spoon food then headed straight over to Theon's table. Bob put a pressuring hand on Theon's back, guiding him out of the room.</p><p>"Don't let his sickness bother you, Greyjoy. Damon just upset that he's too much of a pussy to handle prison, that's why he's here."</p><p>Bob made sure that his words were just barely loud enough to resonate through the room. Qyburn sighed and shook his head, it was a losing battle. He wondered if this experiment was a mistake. It was getting increasingly difficult for mental health services to survive and truly assist clients.</p><p>It was a way to cut costs and yet provide ultimate service. The staff that lived with the patients. Each clients had a personal counselor, saw two doctors, two nurses and several counselors. Qyburn believes this can work it just needs tweaking.</p><p>Once they start their new medication and therapy regimes, Qyburn is sure the patients will calm down.</p>
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<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Salty Attitudes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Its My Party by Lesley Gore</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Excuse me? Will someone please pass me the salt?"</p><p>Stannis raised his voice slightly and clenched his jaw, his fist bending the cheap spoon in his hand. Bob and Theon have not returned, everyone else was either eating or watching Petyr try to deal with his insane family.</p><p>"Petyr! It so sudden, too sudden! It won't be healthy to just go cold turkey!"</p><p>"Lysa, the boy is sixteen! He will survive the weaning process, I assure you!"</p><p>It was like Stannis was invisible and that's exactly how he was feeling at home.</p><p>"Pardon? The salt? Please? I cannot eat this without the seasoning."</p><p>Meryn offered to give Robin something to suckle upon and earned himself a whack from Harold. Cersei quietly murmured to Jeyne.</p><p>"You seem to be a frequent guest, dear. Do they normally hit the guests here?"</p><p>Giggling, Jeyne shook her head then rolled her eyes as if Cersei was too silly for words.</p><p>"Of course not! If counselors hit the <em>guests</em>, they wouldn't leave the <em>patients</em> here."</p><p>"Bless your heart, there's not much in that pretty head, is there? Sansa, I believe if you get close to all that hair on her left side, we can use her head as an echo chamber and sing a duet."</p><p>"Please, I really need the damned salt!"</p><p>Loras sighed and dropped his spoon in the lumpy pudding.</p><p>"Then get up and go find some salt and stop whining about it. No one cares."</p><p>Stannis crashed his fists down on the table before standing up and crashing every bit of china near him.</p><p>"WHAT THE LIVING FUCK DO I NEED TO DO JUST TO HAVE A BIT OF SALT WITH MY UNAPPEALING DISGUSTING MEAL?"</p><p>Shaking, he was embarrassed, aware of the overreaction but unable to change his course now. Swearing, he stumbled away from his seat and towards the kitchen to cool himself down.</p><p>Harold's hand landed on his shoulder just as Stannis reached the pantry back door.</p><p>"Let's take a walk on the grounds together, let you get some air. Unless you want to get that salt and try again with supper?"</p><p>"No thank you. I would rather the walk."</p><p>It turned out that everyone would prefer the walk to supper. Qyburn sighed.</p><p>"Since today has been off since the start, might as well finish off this night with our own odd shamble of rules. Go on then, take them all out for a nice walk."</p>
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<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Ocean Air</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Minimum Wage by They Might Be Giants</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The salt air hitting their faces after the clinic stifled air was ambrosia. All the patients followed after Bob and Harold to the great fenced in outdoors.</p><p>"If you smoke or vape, this is where you <em>used</em> to do it. Only out here at the designated smoking benches. <em>Except</em> smoking is over and you have received nicotine patches if you mentioned that you smoked. Light up or vape <em>now</em> and you are banned. Try and climb over or under the fence, you are banned. Fight anyone, try to escape or generally become an ass-hat and you are banned."</p><p>Bob gave them all a shining smile as he unlocked the last screen door. He spoke slowly as he opened the door and held it for them all.</p><p>"To add onto what Harold has said, you may converse, stand, sit, lay down, sing, journal, jam, have a rock concert, create a mural, we do not care. If it can be deemed therapeutic, you are fine. We have allowed full sporting events and have watched amazing plays done here, we are eager to see how you use both your outdoor and artistic therapy time."</p><p>"Now, today you are only out here to get some air. After today you will come out here not only on small breaks like this one but also to do small amounts of labor. It's therapeutic so don't get your panties in a knot, please, gentlemen. Working with the gardens and surrounding areas. It's peaceful out here, we also use this area for some meditation and yoga classes you might enjoy."</p><p>Ramsay and Damon began to prowl along the fence itself, checking the entire perimeter for weakness to exploit. Once they completed their review they began to search for a place where the twins wouldn't notice them, a spot of their own.</p><p>Jeyne skipped comfortably through the garden, heading for her own personal favorite spot. Meryn dove into the thicker garden area and so did Jaqen.</p><p>Lysa and Robin were hiding in a lovely little forgotten grove area to nurse, at least until Damon and Ramsay showed up to attempt to oust them.</p><p>Stannis, Loras and Theon chose to walk the stone pathway together, following the designated walking path. This took them around the colorful garden and it's stone benches. They were within view of the fence most of the walk, staring down the steep cliff at the ocean.</p><p>Cersei, Sansa and Margeary walked sedately through the gardens. With a tiny smirk, Cersei muttered that her gardeners would weep at the pitiful sight before her.</p><p>Sansa looked at her own perfect manicure, it took her so long to do and all that time taking care of her hands just to destroy them here. It only made her feel more depressed.</p><p>Marge was the first to break.</p><p>"This sucks. A drink, maybe a little pill to pick me up and we can chat brightly all day. But I need a smoke, I'm stressed."</p><p>Cersei nodded.</p><p>"I agree with you, dear, it does indeed suck here. But here we are and we must adjust. Those things that we cannot adapt to we will find a way to change. So let's find out what we can adapt to first, shall we?"</p><p>Ramsay and Damon discovered they had misjudged their prey. Finding themselves in dire trouble, they ran and Lysa won her space. She did however lose the chance to nurse. Lysa had been screeching and flapping about at the men so loudly that it brought everyone.</p><p>"Lysa, I am happy that you got your space. But if we catch you nursing, you will be banned from being outside."</p><p>Ruffled, Ramsay and Damon searched for new prey more than a new space. In the garden there was a lovely little gazebo that Cersei, Sansa and Marge all were sitting in.</p><p>It wasn't a space that they wanted. There was barely any ocean view and you couldn't see who was coming or going. The leered at the ladies but kept going.</p><p>Then they saw the depressed, anxious men tiptoeing along the perimeter careful to remain on the marked pathway. Fresh meat and the two jackals were <em>starving</em>.</p>
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<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Malice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Its So Easy by Guns N Roses<br/>Take On Me by Ah Ha</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ramsay and Damon prowled behind the three dour men walking around the perimeter of the fenced in area. They got closer slowly not wanting to alarm their prey into turning around too early.</p><p>Harold and Bob were paying no attention, they were standing directly under the no smoking sign in order to have a little vape sesh. Still, they waited until the three rounded a second time.</p><p>Once out of sight of the albinos, Ramsay and Damon began to toss things they've gathered along the way. Stannis, Theon and Loras found themselves pummeled by stones, pine cones, sticks and tiny berries.</p><p>"Fucktards! Leave us alone!"</p><p>Loras wasn't aware his words would be seen as an invitation. The two men grinned and came closer, tossing their tiny weapons harder. Stannis grimly advised they ignore the men but Damon threw a really hard stone into Theon's left ear. Yelping in pain, holding his ear, expecting blood, Theon glared at Damon.</p><p>"What the fuck is your problem with me?"</p><p>Damon gave Theon a hateful smile full of malice and spittle.</p><p>"Tell you in therapy, Private Parts."</p><p>Theon recoiled when Damon snorted and spit a huge wad of yellow mucus on him.</p><p>"FUCKER! YOU SICK ASSHOLE! THIS WAS MY ONE CLEAN SHIRT!"</p><p>Damon took a step forward with sincere eagerness and so did Theon, who was smaller but didn't seem to care. Ramsay got between them along with Loras and Stannis.</p><p>"Guys, Harold and Bob are already on their way. Back off or they'll never let you out here again. Come on Damon, you've been here enough times with me to know they'll do it too. Don't get banned when we can find other ways to get the Dick Hunter."</p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Tiny Dancer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Last Resort by Papa Roach</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was in Theon's eyes, in the defensive way he stood with his fists clenched hard enough for the nails to embed in the sweaty skin. In the way he shook and tears came down his face, his slightly off teeth gritted so hard they squeaked.</p><p>Theon knew why Damon and Ramsay wanted some form of revenge. His voice came out ragged, full of a hellish guilt. "You have no right...fuck off! Who told you? Did Kyra tell you? <em>What did she tell you?</em>"</p><p>Damon sneered and backed off as Harold and Bob surged up. "Ah, fellows. Seems like you are all experiencing some form of misunderstanding. Is it over or are we banning someone?"</p><p>Loras and Stannis grabbed Theon and headed on their way.</p><p>Harold and Bob pointed Damon and Ramsay towards the gardens. "Why don't you two go appreciate the flowers for a few minutes?" Ramsay rolled his eyes but led Damon towards the gardens and the ladies.</p><p>With a bit of fascination Damon watched as Cersei discreetly opened a large fake dinner ring to lick up a tiny pill hidden within it. "Remind me that we have to rob her later. Her room must have a little stash we can use."</p><p>Ramsay was on the shorter side and always considered his friend Damon to be large as a wall. As Gregor rose slowly from behind Damon and climbed calmly out of the foliage like a garden giant, Ramsay knew they were tiny after all.</p><p>"You aren't going to rob Cersei or I'm going to eat your eyes then fuck your eye sockets. But let me give you a reminder."</p><p>Bob and Harold tried to follow the screams but they were sharp and fast. By the time they found Damon and Ramsay, they were alone. Both were wiping away tears and vomit was pooled before them but they refused to say what had happened.</p><p>Jeyne cartwheeled in a small clearing then did a small ballet dance she recalled from childhood. Meryn knew better than to dare mess with her and crept past her flying legs. Jaqen also passed the dancing girl but he had no urge to bother her.</p><p>Two nearly perfect pirouettes as Jeyne started to gnaw through her left wrist.</p><p>Marge watched Cersei with an addict's hunger and Sansa watched Cersei with pure adoration. Cersei watched Marge try to figure out the best way to try and get Cersei to give her a hidden goodie.</p><p>Sansa became distracted by the continual heads popping in and out of the foliage around them. "I'm going to play Whack A Creep." She grabbed a long stick and waited. Marge began to try and wheedle a pill out of Cersei and Sansa kept watch.</p><p>Just as Cersei pulled a long thin joint from her sleeve and lit it, Meryn popped his head up, his tongue busy poking in and out with excitement. Sansa hit his head as hard as she could with the stick.</p><p>His hard on died in his sweaty thick palm as the stick broke over Meryn's thick head.</p>
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<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Early Bird</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Mrs. Robinson by The Lemonheads</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cersei begrudgingly allowed Marge to put her lips to the joint and take the smallest of breaths. With a wicked little smile that Cersei didn't appreciate one inch, Marge puff, puffed and passed it to Sansa.</p><p>The redhead held the joint but looked to the elegant blonde for permission. Cersei was thrilled Sansa showed proper respect and she felt Marge needed to learn a little more. But Cersei was starting to feel sick and that was worrisome.</p><p>Her sweating and shaking was more concerning but they cannot know this. Cersei made sure her back was straight, her armpits were a swamp but tightly held shut.</p><p>"Oh, go on then but be fast. Who knows when those albino freaks will pop their heads up? Everyone else does."</p><p>Sansa has only tried weed once before with her older brothers. She remembers giggling, eating too much and falling asleep and her brothers teasing her over it for quite some time afterwards.</p><p>Sansa doesn't remember her brother's joint packed so well and she lights it, taking a very small sip of the thick smoke. The harsh burn made her cough violently as smoke plumed from her mouth.</p><p>A sudden squawk alerted them to the growing white menace heading for them.</p><p>"Is that seagull coming for us? OH MY GOD IT IS!"</p><p>Jeyne laughed along with Meryn, Jaqen, Ramsay, Robin and Damon. The frequent fliers are used to how this hospital works and could have warned the ladies but did not. There is little amusement to such a place and so they play what small games and pranks they can.</p><p>"Drop the joint! It's after your joint! The brothers trained the seagulls around here to take anything you aren't allowed to have. They LOVE cigarettes and joints! We have a better smoking place. Just let the gull have it before the twins get here and have to ban you! They hate banning that's why they move so slow. But they <em>are</em> coming and they <em>will</em> ban you if they catch you."</p><p>Bob and Harold indeed did take their time and by the time they got to the small clearing the gull was gone. Curious but expected. </p><p>Jeyne lay on the thick branch of the tree and sucked on the joint, the trapped gull fluttering under her small foot. Singing a soft song to try and calm the trapped creature, Jeyne released it after it seemed to calm down. It exploded forth, squealing at Jeyne before soaring away.</p><p>Meryn, Jaqen, Ramsay and Damon all stared at her with some mild envy.</p>
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<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Next</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Grim Facts by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cersei decided to blame the loss of the joint solely upon the shoulders of Marge. Surely the girl was holding the joint in such a way that the seagull noticed it and came for it.</p><p>Marge wanted to belong badly enough that she nodded, slumping lower. Humbly, she apologized for the seagull and promised to find a way to replace the joint.</p><p>Giving a delicate sniff, Cersei muttered that she doubted that was possible. With a magnificent nod of the most patient and charitable of faces, Cersei told Marge she was forgiven this time.</p><p>Sansa felt a thrill in the pit of her stomach. Oh, how she longed to be just like Cersei Baratheon!</p><p>The depression was gone, fled and a new focus has been created. Sansa hoped they didn't decide to send her home because she was no longer depressed!</p><p>She needed to stay near Cersei for just a little longer, she HAD to learn from her.</p><p>It took Harold and Bob a few moments to gather everyone to get back inside the cool and yet stuffy building.</p><p>Jeyne had fallen out of the tree, giggling into their arms. Bob forced a mint into Jeyne's mouth while Harold sprayed her from head to toe with a powerful air freshener.</p><p>Cersei murmured that she knew who the favorite around here was. Sansa nodded then leaned forward very slightly and spoke in a voice quiet enough for only Cersei to hear.</p><p>"Actually, I heard that Jeyne's father holds most of the stock to this place. And I know Jeyne from school, her father works for mine so we've been seen at a lot of the same places. She's never been...well. Her mother was lobotomized and lives in a special nursing home somewhere and her uncle killed himself. Her father is desperate to keep Jeyne home and safe."</p><p>"Well, I guess she's our very own special little window licker. Very good intel, little dove."</p><p>Sansa glowed and floated all the way inside and to the medical triage area. She was caught in her own warm thoughts only coming back to earth when Meryn attempted to massage her spleen while whacking off.</p><p>A voice so high and harsh echoed through the dim hallway and Sansa briefly was startled into thinking another seagull followed them inside.</p><p>"NEXT UP IS MEDICAL! PLEASE GO WAIT IN YOUR ROOM FOR THE DOCTOR. AFTER YOUR DOCTOR VISIT COME BACK HERE AND FORM A LINE. THANK YOU. MOVE YOUR ASSES."</p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Triage Temptation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Nurse Rozetta by Alice Cooper<br/>Aspirin Damage by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Each door was open, each patient sitting on their bed, awaiting a doctor. Pycelle started on the right side and Qyburn to the left. Unella assisted Pycelle while Barbary helped Qyburn.</p><p>Both nurses held clipboards and pens to write important info and that is where the similarities ended.</p><p>Barbary was dressed in a carefully starched thick white rayon suit that was the latest thing back in nineteen seventy. Her steel grey hair was aggressively twisted into a bun that sat like a bomb on top of her head.</p><p>Thin pinched lips were greased with mauve, her drawn eyebrows were slightly askew, the foundation was pancake thick but her sun drenched wrinkles held deep shadows.</p><p>Every few moments her dentures would click. Anyone looking at her eye shadow would start to wonder when the last time it was that they saw Mommy Dearest?</p><p>Unella wore a soft grey dress that was as plain and shapeless as any young child bride of a christian cult. Her thick honey hair was pulled back by a matching head band. Her face was without any make up to soften her features.</p><p>Unella was handsome in a rather average way. This was too much for Gregor who wanted to request Barbary immediately and kick Unella out of his room.</p><p>It was not right that it was Pycelle and Unella that Gregor was assigned to. He suffered their eyes and hands, reminding himself that it was all professional and discreet.</p><p>"Gregor, I am going to take your vitals while the doctor gives you a once over."</p><p>He wanted to rip off the woman's head and then pluck out her eyes, eat the professional hands upon him. He nodded assent and allowed them to look him over.</p><p>"Gregor, please step onto the scale for me."</p><p>"Please give me your arm. Gregor, I must take your blood."</p><p>"Here, please urinate in this cup for me."</p><p>It was hard enough to give the crusty old doctor any words at all but it was impossible to do anything but grunt to Unella. Pycelle was just about done with his examination when Gregor finally formed words at Unella.</p><p>"You are a counselor. Why are you in here?"</p><p>Unella gave Gregor a sharp smile of dislike.</p><p>"Actually, I am many things. I am a registered nurse, I am a social worker and a counselor."</p><p>Gregor narrowed his eyes.</p><p>"How many cats do you own?"</p><p>Unella narrowed her eyes.</p><p>"How many do<em> you</em> own?"</p><p>Qyburn gently held Jeyne's chin as he looked into her wildly dilated eyes.</p><p>"Jeyne, you are the only person that can take marijuana and have your brain turn it into LSD. Simply amazing. Well, let's do a quick physical and I'll let you get back to your floating. Barbary, do you still have on file what worked for Jeyne last time she visited us? Let's try that combo again."</p><p>Barbary found the medication chart for Jeyne.</p><p>"Yeah, here we go. Pretty much just loaded her with horse tranquilizers. Can do that easily enough. Hell, I could just use the sedation gun some love so much around here."</p><p>"No, thank you, Nurse Barbary."</p><p>Qyburn and Jeyne answered together and loudly so that the elderly nurse was startled.</p><p>"Oy Vey! You made me drop my glasses and pen. Oh Christ on a crutch, there goes my Chiclets!"</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Check Ups</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Nuclear Infected by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Just in case dealing with Gregor wasn't awkward enough, Unella's next patient was Meryn. While Pycelle muttered over whether Meryn's little toe is gangrenous or just broken and unwashed, Unella was trying to keep the pervert from dishonoring her dress.</p><p>Barbary was horrified when Theon burst into tears and tried to hug her.</p><p>She was offended when Loras screamed when he woke up from a nap to find her over him. He spent the rest of the time trying to offer her make up tips.</p><p>Pycelle was enraged when Ramsay yanked on his beard to see if it was real and took out half of it.</p><p>Qyburn drove himself mad trying to convince Lysa that her son was too old for nursing.</p><p>Robin spent his physical trying to find out if Barbary had any breasts all all under that thick rayon and thicker cotton bra. Qyburn spent Robin's time with him fuming over his mother's behavior.</p><p>Damon angered Pycelle by commenting about his beard and by patting the elderly man on the head to console him. Unella tasered the overly eager giant when he tried to lift her up. </p><p>Marge was allergic to Barbary's Avon Perfume Weekly Special. Qyburn spent the entire time treating the girl for hives and allergy reactions.</p><p>Cersei informed Pycelle that he stunk of cat food and his hands felt like a dead fish belly. Unella ended up conducting most of the physical for the highly indignant elderly doctor. Cersei allowed the nurse to take her vitals but her acidic comments had the woman shaking with anger by the time she was done.</p><p>Qyburn was thrilled to have Sansa as his next patient. A biddable, pretty and boring patient with depression. He was trying a cutting edge medication not quite legal yet but showing great promise. "If you get hives, extreme headaches or an urge to start singing in Italian while eating pineapples, you must stop the medication and come find me immediately! I am very serious, young lady."</p><p>Stannis and Pycelle both felt hostile and unwilling to talk. Unella spoke for all of them in a tired clipped tone. Pycelle did not use the same cutting edge medication for Stannis's depression. He did use an extra medication that was tried and true for those outburts but had some terrible side effects. Pycelle tried to skip those but Unella felt compelled to list every one of them. This prompted a battle with Stannis not wishing to take the medication.</p><p>Barbary had no patience for Jaqen's antics. Qyburn was tired but he smiled at the man wearing a lampshade, standing still at the back of his closet. "Nurse, I can't seem to find our patient. I will turn on this closet lamp and see if he's in here." Jaqen leaped out and the doctor fake gasped while Barbary sneered, rolling her eyes.</p>
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<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Medication Counter</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Bad Reputation by Avril Lavigne</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Barbary collected all the urine and blood samples, handed them to Unella for processing then went behind the medication counter. She locked the door and unlocked the window to the top half of the door.</p><p>Unella marched to the other side and did the same process. They were technically in the same room, only divided by a half door they deliberately kept locked.</p><p>Unella preferred the laboratory and Barbary preferred the medications room. Both considered it their domains and did not cross into each other's territory unless needed.</p><p>Each client had been told to dress then wait at the medication counter for their first dosage of medications.</p><p>Barbary could see them all collapsing or standing near the counter, peering at them through the dingy white slats of the large blind covering the larger window.</p><p>"We can see you peeking at us, it's creepy!"</p><p>Barbary gave the finger to Jeyne who just giggled and continued to wait. The nurse took another moment to give them all a steely glance before making her final preparations before opening the window.</p><p>First Barbary had to fill up a cup with some water and a Constant Comment teabag before putting it in a microwave. After her tea was heated properly and set beside Barbary's computer, she opened the window. The line was ready for her.</p><p>Clicking her dentures and reminding herself mentally to pick up some Polident, Barbary began.</p><p>"Let's see, who do we have here? Ah Meryn! Time to give some chemical castration a try! Don't bother whining, just take it. Open wide, Meryn, there you go, now swallow. Swallow it down, show me. Good boy. Now fuck off, you sick monkey!"</p><p>"Jeyne! Our resident space cadet, here you go! I still think it's easier just to shoot you but..."</p><p>"Cersei Baratheon. Ech, a socialite! A rich one at that. I've seen you in magazines, once on television doing an interview. You look just awful now. Nothing like that, drenched in sweat, shaking, shivering, huge circles under your teary eyes. Alright, we have some lovely pills for you! It's a rainbow! This pink pill will stop the diarrhea, the blue pill will help you sleep and the yellow pill is going to keep you from seizures. This purple liquid you are going to drink will fix all the rest, dearie. Bottoms up."</p><p>Jaqen popped up from behind Sansa as she swallowed her new medications. Rolling her eyes, Barbary gave him his medications refusing to pretend surprise at the sight of the clumsy ninja.</p>
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<a name="section0025"><h2>25. A Mere Nurse</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>How You Gonna See Me Now by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Hey there, Big Boy. Don't you look like a pissed off and jacked up version of Mr. Clean. Oh don't glare at me, I'm not taunting you, just stating a fact. Get over it, Clegane."</p><p>Barbary was wearing thick soled shoes and that allowed her to reach the top of the medication counter, provided she was sitting on her rolling chair. Gregor was so tall and wide that he barely fit the corridor in front of the nurse's station. Yet Barbary showed not an iota of fear when the bald man growled at her.</p><p>"You've never had a sense of humor, Clegane. I've lived here all my life and I know all of you nutcases inside here and out there. You've never even smiled. I think you are constipated. So I've added a laxative to your new medication regime. A nice good shit might unclog those pipes, set a few things right. Try tossing a few prunes into your diet alongside a wicker swing set?"</p><p>"Ah, Loras! What lovely hair you have, better than your sister's to be honest."</p><p>"I am Margeary, Nurse. Not Loras, he's behind me."</p><p>"Are you sure? I thought that Adams apple of yours gave it away. No offense, dear, but you should wear make up if your twin is as pretty as you."</p><p>"Nope, I have no Adams apple and I assure you that I am indeed Margeary. Can't you see my cleavage? See? Loras over there, he's flat and there's his Adams apple."</p><p>"Huh. If you say so. Here's the medication for the twin with the small but realish bosom. Darling, I am not trying to be mean, but if you hope to snag a real good sugar daddy after granny cuts you off, you might want to consider either getting a boob job or a sex change. Either one would do wonders for you."</p><p>"But...I..."</p><p>"Next."</p><p>"I'm Loras, Nurse Barbary. Just so you give me the right medication. Also, I have some questions about-"</p><p>"I imagine that you DO have questions! Having a sister trying to use her identical twin status to become you has to be something you'd question! But that is for the therapists, my lovely young man, and I am a mere nurse. So please swallow, show me your mouth and be off to your therapy!" </p><p>"Stannis, you have only one pill to take, isn't that wonderful? Boring and predictable is your medication, boring and predictable is your issue and that describes you. The problem with you is you let your world get too complicated. There, I just fixed your problem. I can send you a bill and you can leave. Haha! Okay, move on."</p><p>Barbary laughed through the rest of the medication passing until the last person. She staunchly refused to play into any patient's fantasies.</p><p>"Jaqen, when you decide to be a patient you come let me know. I refuse to sneak medication into a trash barrel that you are crouched in. Medication counter is now closed."</p>
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<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Sounds Like Woosh</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This Party Just Took A Turn For The Douche by Garfunkel and Oates</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Barbary snapped the window shut hard on the medication window as the group of newly medicated patients milled there with unanswered questions.</p><p>Theon shook his head in disbelief.</p><p>"I have no idea what medications I just took. Fuck, the only thing I recognized was the sedative."</p><p>Damon sneered and Ramsay leered before he crooned in a evil yet playful sort of singsong.</p><p>"Don't like the flavor of your happy pills, Precious? I have a different kind of pill but you'll have to do something for it. Come see me if you feel desperate, Private PartyPants."</p><p>Theon felt panic fill him like an icy stream.</p><p>"FUCK YOU! FUCK BOTH OF YOU!"</p><p>Ramsay gave him a smile that made his bowels feel watery.</p><p>"Okay. Thanks for the offer."</p><p>Snarling, putting up fists and  blowing out his chest, Theon danced around the two men who just grinned at him maddeningly.</p><p>"Not what I meant, asshole! I'm not gay and if I was it wouldn't be either of you, pretty sure of that. It's clear you guys want a fight so let's just fight it out, yeah? I am NOT scared of you! Either fight me or shut the fuck up!" </p><p>Damon and Ramsay burst into laughter, the ladies nearby tittered behind their hands, devastating Theon.</p><p>Everyone watched while Ramsay leaned slightly closer and spoke in a stage whisper.</p><p>"Uh, Theon? You seem very confused. You want to fuck us and fight us? Guess we remind you of Kyra somehow?"</p><p>With a gasp, Theon backed away from Ramsay just to whack into Damon's chest.</p><p>Damon gave him a full tooth smile, his eyes far too bright and friendly, his voice fake with chumminess.</p><p>"Did you know that Kyra's my second cousin? Ever since she was a little girl, she wanted to be in the military. It was her dream, buddy.  The second she graduated, Krya got on that bus and she had no regrets. Until she met you there were no regrets, just dreams. You took her dream and made it a nightmare. I am so happy you are here with us, Theon. What a happy fucking miracle, right? And I can't wait to tell Kyra everything."</p><p>Ramsay playfully shoved Damon away as he saw the counselors coming. Giving Theon a quick pat on his cheek, Ramsay made him a calm, solemn promise.</p><p>"You can't anticipate or control this situation, Theon. You'll never know when we will strike. You won't know when we are just teasing, just bullying or when we are finally going to turn into your worst fucking nightmare. Listen carefully, if you tell on us, I swear you'll lost at least a limb when we are done with you. Don't make this worse. Not worth losing a limb or your life over."</p><p>Damon grinned at Theon and slung his arm over him as if they were friends.</p><p>"Aw, he won't tell, right? Because deep down you know that you deserve what you get. Way down, search past your PTSD ridden arrogant mind and you'll see that you got away with something awful and you deserve whatever you get."</p><p>Harold and Bob clapped their hands briefly.</p><p>"Everyone! Time for your first circle group. Here are your schedules for the next few days. Everything is there, meals, meetings and breaks. Please follow to the meeting room. Each of you are assigned a therapist of your own that you will see one on one. Between this evening and tomorrow you will meet your therapist."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Tour</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The group tour on the way to the meeting room was as predictable and boring as expected. The floor they used was shaped like a rectangle and it was average hospital size. The hallways were white with a blue line and the rooms were painted blue with a white line in them.</p><p>First was the hall area that held all their rooms followed by the nurses station, the hydrotherapy room and the storage closets. That brings them into the area where the elevator is, where guests visit and where they eat their meals.</p><p>Bob and Harold did not stop but flicked on lights and opened doors as they kept moving.</p><p>"This is the game room. Monopoly, Operation, Axis and Allies, Uno, Chess, Checkers and Bingo. We do have a few computer and video games in here as well."</p><p>"Arts and Crafts Room."</p><p>"Want to jump and run, get out some body slamming? This is our padded trampoline room."</p><p>A small corridor held some locked doors and looked less medical than anywhere else.</p><p>"Those are employee apartments. You are not allowed there, don't do it."</p><p>"This is Dr. Qyburn's office and examination room and here's Dr. Pycelle's."</p><p>"Here's the kitchen and the pantry which can lead to our outside gardens. Which leads to our fenced in area you walked in earlier. And here's all the counselor or therapy rooms one by one. All full of folks eager to massage those sore spots on your grey matter. Now we have arrived at the largest meeting room of all. Please, enter and sit anywhere you wish."</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. Circle Glass Room</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>O.D.D. by Hey Violet</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cersei leaned slightly closer to Sansa and Marge.</p><p>"Their largest room is the size of my youngest son's closet. Pity."</p><p>Marge and Sansa each smirked and agreed aloud. In her mind Sansa knew this room was about the size of her mother's dining room and Marge knew this room was the size of her grandmother's breakfast garden.</p><p>The room was all glass windows and skylights giving the illusion of being outdoors. It was clear by the way the doctors and counselors beamed that they expected the patients to be stunned and transformed by the experience. </p><p>They were highly disappointed in the reactions.</p><p>Robin, Meryn, Damon and Ramsay all plastered themselves against the glass walls to stare down. All were looking for prey and discussing the terrible actions to be done.</p><p>Robin kept licking the window talking about all the breasts he could imagine with milk down there. Meryn made a mess on the window before he got further than "people" he exploded and Ramsay and Damon were discussing human hunts. </p><p>Jeyne began a dance to show homage to the trees around and above them. Loras declared a fear of heights that prevented him from sitting anywhere near the glass, Theon kept looking for snipers and Jaqen ran off to the crafts room to create a tree costume.  </p><p>Half of the time was spent trying to get all the patients into chairs and focused. Cersei, Sansa and Marge sat closest to the counselors with Gregor on Cersei's other side.</p><p>Ramsay and Damon sat the furthest towards the back and the others all scattered in between for the seats they liked best. Jaqen had some trouble sitting while wearing so much brown and green construction paper but he managed.</p><p>Robin and Lysa were forced to sit apart. Loras and Theon sat very uncomfortably between them. The next upset was when they were told their chairs must be in a circle and they must hold hands briefly. </p><p>Jeyne told the doctors with a very serious expression that even though she appreciated that circles were "in" fashion right now, she was always "out" of fashion. Therefore a circle won't do for her.</p><p>Pycelle, Qyburn and Sparrow seemed moments from tears. Petyr spoke in a very kind but hissing tone that reminded Jeyne of a snake from Jungle Book.</p><p>"Now, now, Jeyne. Your father gets a nightly report and tonight will be no different. What shall he hear about Jeyne? If he hears she's trying to adjust to her medication and reacting well to therapy, he will bring you home soon. So let's just bear with the fashion of circles and give your father a reason not to lock you up longer."</p><p>With a very put upon sigh, Jeyne slumped into a chair. Petyr thanked her and Jeyne slapped away a hand that wandered towards her chest.</p><p>"Where are your breasts? You seem to only have nipples, where do you keep your milk?"</p><p>"Do not touch me! I have breasts, you little brat! Don't touch or try to suck them, there's no milk for you! I have no milk cause I don't have babies yet! Don't you KNOW that stuff yet?"</p><p>Stannis leaned forward from his seat and beckoned to Jeyne. "There's room here, young lady. I won't molest you, I promise."</p><p>Nodding, Jeyne disengaged from Robin's wandering hands and sat next to the dour old man.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is a story based in small bits of truth. This room is one of those truths. It is a real room in a day hospital that I ended up in after menopause sent me into mania.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0029"><h2>29. Together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Invisible Touch by Genesis</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It took some major reshuffling before the circle was created but without anyone holding hands this time.</p><p>There wasn't a soul there including the staff that wished to hold Meryn's hand. Jaqen couldn't hold hands because he was a tree and getting Jeyne to stay in the seat was proving to be difficult. She wasn't trying to leave the room but she couldn't settle well.</p><p>The more the doctors forced Jeyne to stay in the chair, the more the girl fidgeted and that drove Cersei to distraction. When Jeyne sat upside down in the chair and used her toes to tap out a rhythm on Stannis's shoulder, Cersei nearly lost her mind.</p><p>"LET THE GIRL WALK ABOUT, PLEASE OR I WON'T BE HELD LEGALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT I DO!" </p><p>Allowing Jeyne to sit cross legged on the floor at the center of the circle took care of that. Everyone else was finally settled within the new circle. Everyone kept their own hands on their laps and only Meryn seemed a little sad about that. </p><p>He seemed vaguely hopeful of Jeyne's position but one look at the muscles hiding in her tiny wiry frame told him to think otherwise. Accusingly, Meryn kicked lightly at the girl and demanded answers.</p><p>"Why are you so jacked? You are like two feet tall, so why bother?"</p><p>Jenye opened her mouth but it was Cersei who smoothly responded.</p><p>"Because she is two feet tall, that's why she had to get jacked. Very sick men like you are the reason that women need to protect themselves, Meryn."</p><p>Jeyne piped up, rocking back and forth, stretching herself into an origami shape that made Jaqen jealous and others wince. Pycelle yelled about the safety of Jeyne's spinal chord but Qyburn just wrote frantic notes and whispered to his nurse, who has finally wandered into the circle.</p><p>As if Jeyne's cheek wasn't resting on her lower back hip, she spoke calmly. It seemed twisting into knots calmed the girl.</p><p>"When I was little my parents were told my crazy was me being bored or needing more exercise. So I did gymnastics, swimming, karate, yoga and I learned to kick box, to box, to wrestle. I took archery, learned to use a blade, a gun. I learned how to hunt, skate and the military said no to me, so I tried to join ISIS for the guns and experience but that's why daddy sent me here this time. I think that's the reason. Or was that last year?"</p><p>Cersei fanned herself and stared at Jeyne.</p><p>"Does your mouth have a zipper on it? Or a cute little button, sweetie? That was an excellent story and during book club, I am asking you to tell us some stories. But for know, just zip that lip, okay? Until my meds kick in, alright? Great."</p><p>Jeyne smiled at Cersei and winked while shooting her with an imaginary gun.</p><p>"I like you. I like how fancy you are. If I shot you, you'd even die fancy and pretty. I won't kill you. Don't worry."</p><p>Cersei nodded and held the little hands while giving the girl an earnest look.</p><p>"Jeyne. I like you too. Because I feel you are utterly out of your fucking mind. That makes you interesting. Now shut your mouth and keep being interesting." </p><p>Damon popped his head up from his dozing next to Ramsay.</p><p>"What's that, Jeyne? You wanted to join the military but didn't? Probably because you were unfit for service so that's why they denied you. Know what? You were lucky. Females in the military have no real safety. My cousin Kyra could tell you that."</p><p>Theon groaned and rubbed his head then his face. Qyburn cleared his throat and tried to gain control.</p><p>"We must hurry and begin before our time is up. We do try to keep to a tight schedule here. On the island we do not have the same resources and budge that our sister hospitals on the mainlands do but we try. We will use a combination of medications provided by Poole Pharmaceuticals who luckily gives their medications for near free. That in combination with several types of therapy and we hope to get you feeling better." </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Next bit of truth:<br/>I am triple jointed and working in haunted houses, contorting came in quite handy.<br/>I am also four feet eleven inches tall.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0030"><h2>30. Hard To Hear</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Friends In Low Places by Kings of the River</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I am missing most of my cosmetics, lotions and soaps. Most of what I use is medicated and needed. It's also more expensive than some of your paychecks. I want to know where my stuff is, please."</p><p>"Thank you but that is not what I meant by sharing, Cersei. However, let me explain that we removed only those items we feel aren't safe for you. That means your lotions and make up was not touched by us. We took anything that was a spray and anything that might be considered a weapon or a way for you to drink or drug."</p><p>Sansa sniffed deeply then said very softly to Cersei that Marge wore a lovely delicate scent, didn't she? Just before Cersei was about to ask Sansa why she would tell her that, it struck her. Cersei leaned over as if to scratch her foot and sniffed deeply.</p><p>It was the most awful timing as all of them were suffering from supper and new medication. Just before Cersie's nostrils were assaulted by Jaqen's smothered fart, she caught wind of Marge's scent.</p><p>It was indeed very delicate and exactly the essential oil that was missing from Cersei's items. Cersei no longer needed to share about this in circle. It was a private matter now. Cersei gave a poignant look to both Gregor and to Sansa.</p><p>"We have very little time left this evening so let's just go around and have everyone say what they hope to get out of this program and what your goals for tonight are."</p><p>All the patients groaned at Pycelle's suggestion but Damon shouted his out first.</p><p>"I HOPE TO LEARN HOW TO STAY OUT OF THE SYSTEM! MY GOAL IS TO MAKE THEON GREYJOY PAY FOR HIS CRIMES AGAINST MY COUSIN KYRA!"</p><p>"Thank you, Damon. We hope to help you learn the right skills to avoid the system. As for the other, I'm afraid it's not up to you to make anyone else pay for crimes. We are concentrating on helping you right now, Kyra will have to help herself."</p><p>Damon gave a wolfish smile to Pycelle.</p><p>"Kyra did help herself by telling me. I was going to go after Greyjoy anyway. I just landed here first and what luck that he did too!"</p><p>Theon exploded out of his chair all limbs, hair, teeth and overdone indignation.</p><p>"OH FUCK YOU, DAMON! THIS IS PERSECUTION! I AM HERE BECAUSE I AM MENTALLY ILL! BECAUSE I SERVED OUR COUNTRY AND GOT FUCKED UP! AND YOU ARE GOING TO COME AFTER ME OVER THIS? I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY BUT IT WASN'T TOTALLY MY FAULT, ALRIGHT? I SUCK, I AM A DOUCHE BAG AND I WILL HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT BUT YOU DON'T GET TO FUCKING JUDGE ME!" </p><p>Ramsay brayed laughter as he barely kept Damon from attacking.</p><p>"Who does get to judge you then, Theon?"</p><p>"Not you, fuckface."</p><p>Ramsay's face became calm and peaceful in a scary way and his voice gave Theon shivers.</p><p>"We'll see about that, won't we, dear?"</p><p>"No, we won't!"</p><p>Damon lost the last grip on his temper and leaped for Theon, who screamed in defiance as he swung his chair at the oncoming human wall.</p><p>No one even saw where Bob and Harold came from or moved they were just there sitting on top of Damon and Theon. Bob looked up at the doctors without missing a beat and spoke casually.</p><p>"Excuse me but it's time for Theon's therapy with me and Damon's first session with Harold. I believe Petyr is to see Cersei, Unella is to see Gregor, Varys is here for Sansa. The doctors plus Barbary will oversee the others in their nightly free time."</p><p>Things might have gone a bit more smoothly then if Jeyne hadn't smiled innocently then asked loudly if Theon was a rapist and if Damon was like Dexter or more like a social justice warrior? Harold and Bob wrestled their charges out of the room, followed by the other therapists and their clients.</p><p>Sparrow shut his eyes briefly and prayed for their medications to kick in soon and work well. He had remembered to have Barbary add a night sedative for each of the patients. By the time they all went to bed tonight, it will be needed.</p><p>It's been sometime since they've had such a full house of needy clients. The staff will need their private time and rest to deal with such a group. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0031"><h2>31. Mistakes Made</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>True Colors by All Time Low</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Nurse, why don't you give the patients their night sedative early tonight? And give us doctors some pain reliever for the damned broken ribs!"</p><p>Barbary used liquid for all hoping for the effects to kick in quicker and it worked.</p><p>Within fifteen minutes of giving out the medications, the doctors were asleep and all the patients were feeling just fine while they wandered the game and crafts rooms.</p><p>Theon sipped at the cup of coffee that Bob gave him.</p><p>Drinking from his own mug, Bob commented that it might help Theon to discuss whatever this situation with Damon was. Before it got out of hand and affected both of their chances at deteriorating mental health. Turning bright red with misery and embarrassment, he nodded.</p><p>"Kyra wasn't my girlfriend or nothing. We were just like, good friends with benefits while we were in basic training."</p><p>Harold gave Damon a can of soda and opened his own. "Let's talk about your beef with Theon."</p><p>"My cousin Kyra was in love with that loser. She wrote me all about him during her basic training. He dumped her right after."</p><p>"I didn't run into Kyra again until she became an MP. We were at the same bar and went to a party together. Got too fucked up and we...had sex and I wandered off right after. I was hammered, I wasn't thinking, just wanting to party and find some more drugs."</p><p>"Bastard left Kyra naked, exposed and passed out on someone's bathroom floor and she got gang raped. Five guys and they left her with an STD, PTSD and a fear of both military uniforms and men."</p><p>"Kyra ended up in the hospital and they acted like I raped her! I got transferred to the shitiest location possible and Kyra ended up in a facility for a while then went home for good. A year later I ended up with my squad all dead around me and my own case of PTSD. And now Damon and his sociopath friend want revenge for Kyra and it's not fair!"</p><p>Harold jotted down that Damon needed a little something to calm his aggressive tendencies and Bob had noted that Theon needed a higher dose of anxiety medication.</p><p>Cersei perched on the edge of the overstuffed couch and glared at Petyr from behind his desk. Petyr smirked and spread out her file before him as he started to play with a gold pen.</p><p>"Oh don't bother. We both know what it says. Listen, I am experiencing mood swings, hot flashes and weight imbalance. Just give me some hormone therapy or something and leave me be! Just do the minimal and I won't sue you out of your ugly suit and tie."</p><p>Petyr raised one eyebrow but crooned in a rather sickeningly sweet voice.</p><p>"The conditions of your coming here were quite clearly written out. You signed an agreement that you both read and understood that. I will leave the doctor to set up your hormonal needs. I hear tell that black Licorice is good for the-HEY AHH! AHH!"</p><p>Sansa played with her hair as Varys went over her file quickly. Pursing his lips over the medication, Varys shut the file and folded his hands to smile at the redhead.</p><p>"I am not a huge fan of medication or experimental drugs...however, it's clear you need help. As you know with your Aunt Lysa, mental illness does tend to run in your family. So let's try this drug that Qyburn wants you on and we shall endeavor to find ways to get you off of it as soon as we can. I think some good therapy and rest will be just the ticket to get you back home and in good health, Sansa."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0032"><h2>32. Talk Talk Talk</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Talk Talk by Alice Cooper<br/>Unwell by Matchbox Twenty</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Unella had taken special care to make her therapy room as inviting and relaxing as possible. The walls were painted a light grey with tiny pink flowers here and there. A poster of an adorable kitten hanging from a branch and a small vase with a flower in it were sending Gregor into a haze of rainbow colored rage that paralyzed him.</p><p>"I want to skull fuck you. I want to eat you alive. I want out of this room and the fuck away from you. I can't take it. Get away from me you Jezebel, you fucking WHORE! TRYING TO TEMPT ME WITH YOUR HARLOTRY HANGING ALL AROUND YOU!"</p><p>Unella sat still and narrowed her eyes.</p><p>"How am I being a whore, I want to know. Please, explain."</p><p>"Why don't you feel she has a right to fight this for herself, Damon? This Kyra sounds like a smart, tough resourceful woman according to you. Did she specifically ask you to find and hurt Theon?" </p><p>Damon cracked his knuckles and stared hard at Harold.</p><p>"Look, I know Kyra won't do anything about it more than what she's done. She got the others in jail and just wants to let Theon go. It's not right, he deserves some of her pain. I am just lucky that my best buddy Rams gets it and he'll take care of that arrogant G.I. prick if I can't."</p><p>Harold shook his head. It was impossible to get through the thick head.</p><p>"Let's talk about what landed you in here in the first place, yeah? Forget Theon for a minute. Let's just talk about why you are here."</p><p>"It was a misunderstanding. We thought it was hunting season."</p><p>"Uh huh. Except you were hunting inside a rabbit sanctuary."</p><p>"Well, I guess we were poaching instead of hunting?"</p><p>"You were holding a young female employee at gunpoint and trying to force her to skin the rabbits alive while naked."</p><p>"It was Ramsay's idea to have her skin the rabbits. I'm the one who thought of her doing it naked."</p><p>Harold felt a headache starting.</p><p>"Being pretty, being popular and smart isn't enough anymore. I...felt so alone and I just couldn't stop crying. Then I couldn't sleep anymore and I just fell apart. Then I stopped caring that I wasn't pretty or popular...I just stopped caring about anything at all. I simply just stopped...being."</p><p>Varys patted Sansa's hand and handed her a tissue.</p><p>"College can be a bit traumatic if one isn't prepared. And it's so seldom that anyone can be prepared for such a drastic lifestyle change. I think considering your family background, its not unexpected that this experience catapulted you into a rather boring clinical depression. What a terrible state to spend your young adulthood in. But I did notice that while you were around Cersei there was a bit of a sparkle to you again. That is a very good thing. It means you are still capable of finding interest in things. Let's try and explore what it is that gave you the spark. What was it about Cersei and your situation that brought about the emotions?"</p><p>Petyr stared at Cersei with barely concealed fury.</p><p>"Are you done? Would you like to destroy anything else? My step son made that mug you shattered. My wife gave me that pencil set you just sent through my window. That vase was an antique and bought during a vacation I will never have again."</p><p>Cersei sniffed and patted her hair back into place as she sat back on the couch.</p><p>"At least I can breathe with the wind hitting me. If your window wasn't locked, I wouldn't have had to break it just to get some air. And let's be honest, that mug was ugly, the pencil set was horrendous and that vase didn't match the room. Tell me the value of each of those things and I will pay you for it."</p><p>Leaning forward, Cersei gave Petyr a wheedling kind of smile and tone.</p><p>"Listen, don't you want more out of life than this place? If you convince my husband and father that I can leave this place, I'll hire you. You can be my therapist privately and you can live on my estate. I can pay you twice as much and give you a much better living situation."</p><p>Petyr sat up, he focused greedily upon Cersei's words and then he whispered to her.</p><p>"That sounds like a nightmare. Surrounded by Lysa, Robin and you all demanding things of me as I quietly drown in quality surroundings. Thank you but no. Now, since you are cooler, let's start again."</p><p>Bob wished he asked Harold to borrow some of his special headache pills as he listened to Theon whine on and on. The man was focused on all the wrong things. He was angry that he was being "haunted" by men that he didn't like to begin with.</p><p>Theon was angry that others felt he was the reason Kyra was raped. Nothing seemed to ever be Theon's direct fault. Even when he admitted something was his fault, it was really someone else's fault which he would expound upon in great loud length.</p><p>Theon sobbed a little when he spoke of how he was mistreated at home as a child. Bob did concede that the records of Balon Greyjoy were immense. He was arrested for child and domestic abuse countless times and Theon's medical records as child were appalling.</p><p>"Tell me about your family."</p><p>"I had one. All dead but my little brother, Sandor. I take care of him, he's trying to run our business with a busted leg while I am stuck here."</p><p>Unella nodded while Gregor glared at her.</p><p>"Sandor is in that position because of your anger, correct? So it's important that you are here learning to get a grip on your temper. How did your family die, Gregor?"</p><p>"My father was found beaten to death at the edge of our property. No one was ever charged. My mother fell down the basement stairs and broke her neck. My sister was the victim of a hit and run. My brother and I have seen tragedy. But thanks for dragging that back up for me. Have I mentioned that I would like to strangle you as I sodomize you? That I want to stick my cock into holes that I create on your skin? Whore, do you know what I could do with that pen you keep writing with?"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0033"><h2>33. Music Therapy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Twist and Shout by Ferris Bueller's Day Off</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Robin yelled over the sound of Pycelle's snoring.</p><p>"What is this thing?"</p><p>Meryn's eyes widened and he ran over to Robin. Lysa peered down and responded that it was a VCR. Pawing through the box next to the device, Robin found nothing of interest.</p><p>Meryn found a movie and to Robin's fascination, he opened a box, took out a tape and inserted it smoothly into the grey metal. Robin recoiled when the theme to Muppet Babies began while Meryn took down his sweatpants with pleasure.</p><p>Meryn confided pleasantly to Robin, as if commenting on the weather.</p><p>"Too old but it'll do in a pinch."</p><p>Robin had many questions but Lysa grabbed his arm to yank him out of the room.</p><p>"Sick, sicko man! My little boy won't be exposed to you!"</p><p>Meryn yelled back, "You only like exposing yourself to him! You just don't want to share."</p><p>Robin managed to get out of the way just as his mother went nuclear on Meryn. Leaving the screams and squawks behind, Robin decided to float a different direction. When Barbary noticed the doctors sleeping but the patients awake, she got mean.</p><p>"What the hell kind of disturbing creepy patients are you? You've tired the doctors out with your crazy! You are so nuts that regular sleep medication doesn't work on you?"</p><p>Barb seemed to be deciding what medication to try next. Ramsay gave the politest smile in his life and used his most rational soft voice.</p><p>"Sometimes a regular dose of medication just doesn't work. Why not give us a second dose? Or are you one of those nurses that gets soft on giving too much medication?" </p><p>With an indignant snort, Barbary stormed back inside her little office and began a bigger dose of painkiller for each.</p><p>The patients had no problem lining up for another dose. The only one not in line for the second dose was Meryn but when Barbary figured out why she ignored him. It was for the best, at least in her mind.</p><p>"There. All of you go find a last game or show then go to bed. Now."</p><p>Jaqen slammed against the wall, slid down it and did a quick somersault over to the kitchen area. He threw himself into the dark room with a clatter. A moment later he climbed back out with a radio under his sweatshirt. He rolled along the wall until he found a shadow to melt away into.</p><p>Barbary snapped the window shut and started to pour a little something extra into her teacup when the music started. Opening her window, she encountered Ramsay's smiling face again. He assured her that they all slept better with music. She accepted this and snapped her window shut again.</p><p>It was nearly eight o'clock and Barbary wanted to get home. As soon as a damned doctor woke up or a single therapist showed their face, she was going to her apartment! Mr. Wally Cronkite must be so hungry and Ms. Mullins gets to be a bitch when she goes late on her arthritis pill. Barb wanted to get to her cats and to Judge Judy.</p><p>She faithfully records every episode and watches it while having her Healthy Choice. And the kitties have their Purina and their pills. Just like Barb will take her own damned pills for these annoying aches and pains that her liquor bottles won't handle. She was too tired to care if they wanted to have thumping music to sleep to. They <em>were</em> crazy, after all.</p><p>Unella, Petyr and the twins all came to their doors at the same time.</p><p>Varys and Sansa were already in the hallway, drawn by the music. Varys and Sansa had been drawn by the increasingly louder theme song to the Muppet Babies seemingly played on a loop. The rest were drawn out by the dance music on the radio.</p><p>Sadly, the group decided as a whole to open the television room door first and the sight made them all wish for blindness.</p><p>Sansa shut her eyes fast but the image stayed. Damon slammed his palms over his face and Theon had cried out in pure revolted horror. Cersei blinked and dryly requested some eye bleach.</p><p>Petyr slammed the door shut fast and suggested they search out the other music.</p><p>Taking note of the sleeping doctors here and there, they followed the sounds to the arts and crafts room. They found Marge and Jeyne dancing with Loras. Stannis was using the pottery wheel and creating something that looked droopy and phallic.</p><p>Harold and Bob went in search for Lysa, Robin and Ramsay. They found them playing a heated game of Candy-Land in the lobby. Unella found Jaqen standing in the pantry wearing potato sacks. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0034"><h2>34. Moist Skin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Mrs. Potato Head by Melanie Martinez<br/>Feed My Frankenstein by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Painkillers helped Cersei remain calm but it did nothing to alleviate the intolerable boredom of insomnia. There were no movies, books, computers or anything in her room to truly keep her attention. She was allowed a journal, some drawing papers and chalk with board on the wall. A small metal mirror in the bathroom kept her company for some time.</p><p>Staring intently at the flesh upon her face, she used what was left of her skin regime to try and fix the blemishes. Small exercises to strengthen her facial muscles were done with extra care and she flossed and brushed her teeth until they gleamed in between the blood filled lines. She paid attention to her hair next, a scalp treatment for the psoriasis, timer set.</p><p>A manicure was just long enough before it was time to rinse her head and wash it with a special shampoo then conditioner. While the conditioner set, it was just long enough for a pedicure. After rinsing the conditioner out of her hair, it was time to wash and exfoliate her body then pat dry and lotion up slick.</p><p>While her body slowly let the lotion sink in and moisturize her flesh, Cersei used her dull tweezers to pluck out the most offending of hairs upon her imperfect flesh. She wished like hell that Marge had not stolen her favorite facial mask, that little tart. During that circle time, Marge had confessed a specific problem. Having kleptomania was no good excuse to steal from her and that was that. </p><p>Now that Cersei was done with her beauty regime, she still had the rest of the night to do nothing. Thinking of revenge against Marge was at least a fun start to the longest night. Putting on her favorite pajamas, Cersei lay on the bed with her notebook and pen, looking out the window with a deadly pleasant smile. Waiting for Kali or another goddess of darkness to offer her a muse.</p><p>
  <em>Gregor's head fell onto his forearm, sweat from his forehead splattering, a muted groan escaped his clenched teeth.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>One huge hand was pumping so hard on his immense cock, it seemed like he was ripping it off in anger rather than masturbating.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>In his mind Unella was screaming, she was begging for him to stop.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He slowly fed on her face, eating her tongue as she gave rattling, dying breaths.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>When he released into his own hand, it was with a shudder and in his mind he heard bones crushing beneath him, blood and semen mixing.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Gregor was surprised and properly horrified to find tears coming out of his eyes afterwards.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Why did the thought of crushing her to death make him cry?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Maybe he should masturbate to the idea of smothering or stabbing Unella to death?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He can only masturbate to skull fucking her so many times, after all.</em>
</p><p>Barbary fed herself and the cats, offered out the usual pills before heading into her bathroom. She clipped her toenails while taking her normal evening dump then changed her corn pads. Washing her hands, beginning the tub for her bath, it never crossed Barbary's mind that there might be a meeting about her.</p><p>
  <strong>It was a hurried meeting called or rather, forced by Unella upon the staff including sleepy doctors. However, Qyburn won out. He reminded them all that Barbary had a record more exemplary than any other nurse for this unique program. If Barb wasn't retired and stripped of her license already, the never could have afforded her. They should be grateful and not get so upset over a clear small mistake. Unella refused to let it go and had the counselors support behind her. The doctors conceded that if Barb continued this error something must be done. She will be monitored. Unella wasn't satisfied but it was something.</strong>
</p><p>Barb slid into her boiling hot tub and pretended it was a Jacuzzi.</p><p>Turning on her cheap cell phone, she listened to Bobby Darin sing Splish Splash happily. Pouring lavender into her tub and a little other bottle into herself, Barb floated away. Even if she knew of the meeting, Barb wouldn't have cared much. Barb never thought long on mistakes, on potential worries, she never had any. Barb had few regrets and was never overly bothered with things like shame or guilt.</p><p>Barb never thought of the children that she helped illegal doctors test on in college. It never bothered her that she stole drugs and sold them when she was an Army nurse. And if Barb sometimes messed up these days was it really a big deal? Dragging a mustard yellow washcloth over her vein swollen legs, Barb hummed along with the music.</p><p>She ran the washcloth over her face and her eyebrows disappeared. As did her lips and cheeks. Her cats meowed loudly and ran away as if in terrified judgement. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0035"><h2>35. Dreamscapes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Welcome To My Nightmare by Alice Cooper<br/>Pit Of Vipers by Simon Curtis</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The medication was foreign to Sansa who never tried drugs of any kind before. She lay in the bed, eyes closed and her mind drifted as did her hand. Caressing her own silky smooth legs, she whined softly as her hand shyly climbed higher. When she reached the apex, her fingers dove deeply into her La Perla underwear as if embarrassed. </p><p>Even as her mind drifted into actual sleep, the fantasy continued, it followed Sansa down. Such a perfect woman, understated make up, a lingering scent that smells like sex and money, it made her drench her busy fingers. Cersei wearing nothing more than her best jewelry, hair everywhere in large curls, urging her forth.</p><p>Sansa rubbed her clitoris and in her imagination she rubbed her face against that rich thick honey hued hair. Capped perfect teeth nibbled on Sansa's nipples while she sucked hard on such near perfection. Cersei tasted of honey, diamonds and lust and Sansa had to bite her tongue to stifle herself as she headed towards a climax.</p><p>Earth shattering pleasure shook Sansa in her dreams and it felt so wonderful to wear Cersei Baratheon.</p><p>
  <em>Stannis was caught in an awful nightmare.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He tried so hard to keep blowing out the flames that were burning his little Shireen to death.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Stannis didn't want this, he tried to scream it. But every time he did, Selyse or Melissandre stuck a breast or tongue in his mouth.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He wanted to kick the flaming sticks away from his daughter's legs.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But every time he tried, either his wife or mistress were kneeling, sucking his cock and tightly holding his legs.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Bucking, biting and shoving at his women only made them lustier for him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The more Shireen burned and screamed, the lustier they became.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Stannis screamed but his cock responded.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He found himself fucking both his wife and mistress while his daughter burned.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>THIS ISN'T REAL, THIS ISN'T ME! I WOULD NEVER DO THIS ITS NOT WHAT I COULD EVER DO! STOP STOP STOP!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Stannis woke up drenched in sweat and sobbing.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He did not sleep again.</em>
</p><p>Theon's crown was tight, almost too tight but the staff in his hand felt right and the chair under him was solid. It was huge because the chair's shadow was huge, it hung nearly halfway across the impossibly large royal court. Kyra was there in a pretty dress that he remembered from some party they went to together. She was making fun of his crown and that pissed him off enough that he struck her face hard enough for her lip to bleed.</p><p>Kyra didn't cry though, she spit the blood on him and Theon found himself licking it up then pulling her into a dance. A royal dance for a royal king and that's when Theon noticed his courtiers were all his dead squad. Struggling to get away from Kyra as his squad closed in, Theon woke up with a terrified shout. He spent the rest of the night with the light on, trying to read magazines that Yara had thrown into his bags.</p><p>Loras leaned against the cold porcelain sink and murmured about how this was messing with his beauty sleep. He enjoyed the feeling of being stoned, yes, but he would have actually appreciated a good night's sleep for once.</p><p>He tried to fix up his puffy eyes with some collagen but no luck. A few other products and Loras simply gave up. He brushed his teeth and they fell out.</p><p>One by one like pearls into the sink, clattering delicately among the swirling water. Loras woke up screaming and spent the night counting his teeth over and over.</p><p>
  <strong>Damon was so careful when Kyra handed him the tiny bunny. "Its my new pet! You can play with him until I have to take him home, Damie!" Damon tried so hard to be careful but he just wanted to hug the rabbit and it kept nipping him. Kyra cried when she saw how crushed up her new bunny was. But she forgave Damon when she saw how badly his daddy beat him up for it. Damon didn't cry when his daddy hurt him over the rabbit but when Kyra forgave him in a voice full of grief, he sobbed on her shoulder. He woke up needing to hurt Theon so badly that his cock was hard. </strong>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0036"><h2>36. Night Sounds</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Walking On Air by Kerli<br/>I'm Gonna Show You Crazy by Bebe Rexha<br/>Pain by Alice Cooper</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Marge pawed through her grandmother's jewelry, trying to dig past the costume pieces. There! Magically, she had the tiny key to the secret panel with a tiny lock in it. Opening it, gasping, Marge pawed through the true glitter of gems, of pearls and so much more. Each piece was licked, touched and worn before Marge put it inside her pockets.</p><p>She turned and heard a deafening crack. Looking down Marge saw a huge crack running from between her feet all the way down the hallway. Shit. Taking a deep breath, willing herself to be lighter than air, trying to remember being a ballerina, she moved fast in a blur. The crack was even louder and she plunged down, jewelry flying all about her.  </p><p>Marge landed in a pirouette on the stage, with everyone watching her. This was a terrible recital and she wished not to be there but was stuck in it, stuck in the emotion. Stuck being in fifth grade and angry that her parents missed another one of her recitals. Her twin and her grandmother never missed any of her things but her parents NEVER showed. She danced gracefully, wonderfully and the whole time she was wishing her parents were dead.</p><p>Which was funny to her later when the police met them at the house. Marge was still holding the flowers given to her by the teacher as the police explained to her grandmother that her parents died in a car crash. They apparently were trying to make it to Marge's recital as a birthday surprise and were speeding. They lost control and smashed into a tree. Only Marge ever blamed herself for their deaths. Skeletal arms wrapped around her tightly and rotted mother lips touched her ear. "Its okay, it's not your fault and we'll never leave you."</p><p>Marge screamed as she woke up and ran to take a shower. She scrubbed her ear until it bled.</p><p>
  <em>Jeyne jumped up and down on her bed until she felt the excess energy seemed to leave her. Standing on the floor, Jeyne began to spin around the room on one leg, then dipping low, coming up high into a leap.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She flung herself against the wall and slid around all four of them. Giggling, Jeyne curled up in the window after she kicked the old bars out of the way. Staring up at the moon, Jeyne began to drift off and soon enough her eyes closed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That's when the banging and shouting began. Scrambling fast, Jeyne crawled under the bed and rocked fast and hard. Her hands over her ears, waiting for the world to end. Some pills helped these things and other pills caused these things but Jeyne can't even move to scream for help.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The bed flipped upwards and a beam of light blinded her. "NO NO NO NO NO!" "Now now Jeynie, its for your own good! Jeynie, don't you want to make daddy famous? Don't you want mommy to ever love you? Or Daddy to stop loving you?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>More needles, more pills, more liquids, more tests. Like being in a white room and only seeing white things, eating only white foods. Jeyne would scream in pain when she left the white room for a week or two every time.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Laying naked with burning in her body and white coats talking over her, touching her like she was a piece of machinery. Burning things in her nostrils, in her eyes, in her body it hurt, it hurt and then it felt like winter, just cold, numb, lovely but it didn't make anyone love her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Unloved, Jeyne curled up under the bed and waited for pain. Suddenly she was angry over this and decided she could deliver the pain herself. She fought shadows.</em>
</p><p>Meryn used both his hand to pleasure himself. One hand cupping his furry nuts and the other one on his cock. He let so many things flow through his mind. He found himself humming the theme to Muppet Babies. A shuffling sound came from the other end of his room and he peeked over his self made lump in the covers. </p><p>He watched in fascination and disbelief as a lovely furry violet puppet gracefully crawled towards him. Shaggy ponytails, large flat plastic eyes and the traditional flap mouth made him swell in lust and terror. It wore a yellow t shirt and orange shorts, blue sneakers and striped tights over soft flannel legs.</p><p>The puppet slithered up onto the bed and Meryn moaned, reaching for the felt creature. He grabbed a ponytail with each hand to yank it down towards his raging hard on. The flannel face opened so wide it seemed to split before it slammed shut hard onto Meryn's cock. Blood spurted everywhere and Meryn woke up screaming.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0037"><h2>37. Wakey Wakey, Eggs And Bakey</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Fruit Salad by The Wiggles</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A hard quick rap at the door and an albino head popping into doorways marked the morning.</p><p>"Wakey Wakey! Eggs and Bakey!"</p><p>"Time to rise and get dressed, please. Head for your medications then breakfast. Breakfast in twenty minutes and attendance is mandatory."</p><p>Jeyne, Ramsay and Damon were woke earliest for breakfast duty. With overseers like Harold and Bob meant there was room for music, dancing and mild shenanigans while creating breakfast.</p><p>However, anything that seemed like bullying or sexual harassment was instantly squashed. At one point it did get a bit much and Bob had to pull Jeyne aside. He reminded her that no man wished to be compared to vegetables.</p><p>Bob also reminded her that even though she found it funny to chase them with English cucumbers, the men did not. The playful but rough atmosphere lasted until a new person entered the kitchen. Theon looked half awake still and mumbled his words.</p><p>"Uh, I am on the schedule to set the table and clear it?"</p><p>Jeyne gave a welcoming smile to Theon and showed him where the plates were but Damon and Ramsay just stared at their prey. The twins whacked Damon and Ramsay's heads as they walked by.</p><p>"Forget it. We are working on eating breakfast, not hunting damaged men."</p><p>Cersei took the time to braid and loop it around the top of her head, allowing a few thick long curls to hang down her back. The only jewelry she was allowed to have was her wedding band and matching diamond marquis.</p><p>Her outfit was an old ivory sweater, white shirt and a pair of blue jeans she always meant to wear. It was the outfit she bought to wear on the sailing trip with her family. Tommen and Myrcella had been part of the yacht club.</p><p>
  <em>Cersei missed the trip, of course. She had been trying out an experimental treatment on her face and it messed up, landing her in the hospital so they took the trip without her.</em>
</p><p>Pristine white sneakers, white thick socks she doesn't remember ever wearing and Cersei understood that her family had packed this particular bag with items they felt she would need ahead of time. Damn. She forced the guilt away and started to work on putting lotions and some make up on her face.</p><p>Once her armor was in place, face and hair done, the outfit might be simple but she'll rock it nonetheless. Having gone crazy was no reason to look like shit if she can help it. Taking a deep breath, Cersei headed for breakfast.</p><p>Behind her, she heard another door open fast and she saw red hair swing from a ponytail behind her. Then she smelt her own fragrance, letting her know Marge was here as well. Oh goodie. It was all the ladies together.</p><p>"Either a seagull is having an argument with a Teddy Ruxpin bear or Lysa and Robin are ready for breakfast."</p><p>The ladies gave Stannis a mild smile at his dour quip. He followed the ladies towards the cafeteria, picking up Loras and Theon as they went by their rooms. Gregor appeared from his room as Cersei passed it. Meryn was already heavy breathing at the breakfast trays.</p><p>Jeyne fended him off with a ladle.</p><p>"Go get your damned meds first then come back for food! To eat not to fuck! Go! All of you, go!" The half asleep group turned as one zombie and headed to the medications counter.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0038"><h2>38. The Ring Hand Slap</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Smack My Bitch Up by The Prodigy</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I don't want food, I want mother's milk! DaddyPetyr, I want-"</p><p>The sound of the slap was deafening as was the sound of Lysa's shriek of heartbreak.</p><p>"So much drama before breakfast." Murmured Cersei as she tried to burn through Petyr's head with her glance. "It's bad enough they are forcing me into this pitiful meal but to subject me to Petyr's domestic abuse is too much to ask." With a giggle, Jeyne leaned over as she ladled scrambled eggs onto Cersei's plastic tray.</p><p>"Petyr doesn't have to hit Robin as much when Lysa's not around. But the opposite isn't true. At least one of them is always here, kind of like me." Jeyne winced when Harold's thick middle finger ring whacked her smartly in the head. "Less gossip, more serving. If you miss eating breakfast, you'll end up with a nose feed. Move it."</p><p>Cersei didn't know what that meant but it must have been awful to make Jeyne shut up and focus. It lasted until Jeyne finished scooping eggs for everyone and took her own tray, handing one to Theon, to Ramsay and Damon. Jeyne added the breakfast they'd made to everyone's trays. Damon added a glob of mucus to Theon's eggs and Ramsay pissed in Theon's apple juice.</p><p>While Theon threw out and refilled his breakfast, the others sat down. Jeyne found an empty chair with Cersei, Marge and Sansa. The ladies were not only not used to institutional food, they certainly weren't used to breakfast made by those on tight budgets. Cersei toyed with a strip of pink meat with her fork and finally inquired what it was.</p><p>Jeyne smiled, fondly remembering her first time asking this question. "It's called SPAM. It's a potted meat and most of the institutions I've been in have us make it. I once stole a can out and served it to my family at lunch. My mother grounded me for two weeks for it. Everything they serve here is Grade E for Edible but SPAM is its own special thing. Taste it."</p><p>Cersei delicately shuddered and shoved the SPAM to the side. She started to pick at the fruit salad instead. "Surely this has to be better than the SPAM." Jeyne nodded and proudly announced that she used only the best cans, with the least amount of colors and dents. Groaning about botulism in all the wrong places, Cersei pushed past the canned fruit and reached for her eggs.</p><p>"Those eggs don't expire until midnight!" Cersei threw down her fork. "I'll take the tube feeding as long as they clean the tube first." Shrugging, Jeyne responded, "It depends if you get Unella or Barb." Cersei shook her head and sighed. "I'm sunk. I can't take anymore. Stop talking, Jeyne. Please. I'm going to force myself to eat this toast and I want silence from you, not even a pitying look at my food."</p><p>Jeyne gave a tiny pout. "Fine, but I was really proud of scraping ALL the green off the bread!" Cersei swore and all three of the ladies dropped their napkins over their trays.</p><p>Breakfast for staff was usually had in their own apartments. They shared lunch and suppertime with the patients, asking for breakfast as well was just too cruel. This was really the only reason the breakfast was usually so subpar compared to the rest of the meals. Not that the other meals were usually amazingly delicious but they usually were at least edible with some flavor.</p><p>Therefore, neither Harold nor Bob could force themselves to make the ladies finish their breakfasts. Not after they saw the fare created by the worst three cooks in the building. Not that any of the patients were cooks, per say but some others knew at least rudimentary cooking. These three followed basic instructions from the twins and winged the rest. The food was so bad even Meryn wouldn't touch it.</p><p>That's why Robin also refused to eat his breakfast, not only because of his desire to drink his breast milk. But Petyr's mood was bad, he couldn't sleep well and he overreacted. He was tired of being the butt of every joke because of his difficult family. Everyone knows he had a crush on Lysa's sister Cat all their youth. It was assumed he only went after Lysa because he couldn't have Cat.</p><p>It was partially true and that made Petyr that much angrier over it. He lived alone until he found a way to poison Lysa's husband and marry her. Petyr wanted to poison Ned and marry Cat but he was realistic enough to know Cat wouldn't ever marry him. Lysa would though, she gave him her virginity years ago.</p><p>He believes Robin might actually be his son and that also made him angry. Because Robin is just as crazy as his mother and that was on her, not him. Petyr believes his can change and mold the boy, if not the mother. Lysa doesn't know it yet but this is her last chance. She should be worried that Petyr is no longer trying to change her, only Robin.</p><p>But the woman is too stupid and crazed for such a thing as thinking or seeing. She doesn't see that Petyr plans on poisoning her as soon as they return home. Petyr knows without Lysa around, Robin will be far more malleable. Right now, his temper is pricked and Petyr has slapped Robin to a tearful silence. He rounded on Lysa with a fierce smile. "Eat and shut up. So your son will."</p><p>"I can't eat any of this swill and I can't make Robin eat such awful unhealthy food either! I have no choice but to breastfeed him! Hitting my poor son won't change that!" Petyr's ring caught the fluorescent light then it caught Lysa's pointed chin. It was as if he set off a bomb. That same little button deep inside Cersei that got her sent here in the first place was just firmly pressed.</p><p>Her diamond ring caught Petyr right under his own chin. "Strike anyone again, I'm going to rip off that hand and shove it up your ass! See how you like the feeling of your own fucking ring!" She heard scattered applause and grinning, Cersei curtsied just before the twins rounded on her.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0039"><h2>39. Revolt</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Yakety Sax by Theme from Benny Hill</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The second that Harold and Bob grabbed onto Cersei, Gregor stood up and grabbed the albinos. One in each hand and he tried to toss them. The problem was they still each had hold of Cersei.</p><p>When Gregor tossed them each to a side, the woman was nearly wrenched in two. She screamed as the men let go and Gregor tried to save her by plucking her up and shaking her.</p><p>The violent motion made her vomit on his feet and nearly faint. This was too much for the violence prone and Jeyne howled while leaping onto Gregor's back. This made Damon and Ramsay laugh before they attacked Theon.</p><p>Stannis began to smash trays onto Damon. Loras hollered while he threw everything in his reach at Ramsay. Theon's training has kicked in but even with assistance of the tableware, it was two against one.</p><p>Meryn has gone too long without relief and gibbering like a lunatic, he attacked Ramsay. Wrapping his entire self around Ramsay's head, he tried to rape the waxy ear he found. Screaming, Ramsay flailed about, leaving Damon to deal with Theon alone.</p><p>Damon smiled wide as he knocked Theon nearly senseless with a haymaker. He was about to make mincemeat out of Theon's pretty face when the SPAM slapped him into last century. Loras cheered. "Direct strike, Sir! Excellent! Another, if you please!"</p><p>Damon reeled but managed to kick Stannis's bad knee, taking the man to the ground. He reached out, searching to squeeze the head out of the pretty boy. "Come here, you useless pretty thing, gonna pop your head off like a dandelion."</p><p>Loras sniffed and primly replied, "No thank you." He remained out of reach and kept throwing things while Theon tried to squirm away.</p><p>Overwhelmed, Jeyne sat on Gregor's back and her head flashed back then forward, her canines flashing. She bit deep and hard into the bald head, causing the man to roar in pain. Tears coming down her face, Jeyne kept biting as she rode the man who was looking for a wall to smash into.</p><p>"Jeyne! Stop eating Gregor's head! Gregor, don't you dare squash my little nutcase! We need her." Jeyne stopped biting Gregor's head and he plucked her off, tossing the ball of hair and teeth away. "Why is she sobbing when SHE bit ME?" Sobbing loudly, Jeyne sailed and crashed into Petyr. That caused them to crash into Bob, taking them into the wall.</p><p>With a grin, Gregor turned to see Unella standing within reach. With a bleeding head and a terribly evil chuckle, he lumbered forward only to receive the fully charged end of her cattle prod. When Gregor crashed, he took out the table, Damon smashed underneath his electrified body. Unella cheered quietly, pleased with catching two in one shot.</p><p>The rest of the staff all showed and surveyed the mess. Their harshes gazes landed directly upon Petyr, Harold, Bob and Unella because she got there first. Sighing, Unella prepared to defend herself while making ice baths. </p>
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<a name="section0040"><h2>40. Priorities</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Qyburn, Pycelle and Sparrow are doctors that rarely agree with each other but all were equally appalled right now.</p><p>Holding a finger up, Qyburn wanted to remind everyone that these counselors tried to blame the patients behavior on Barb's medication giving skills but here are the counselors acting like punchy fighters with patients!</p><p>Pycelle slammed his cane down as hard as his broken ribs would allow.</p><p>"I would see Petyr, Harold, Bob and Unella in private immediately. Doctors?"</p><p>The elderly bristled their way to the conference room and left Barbary to clean up the mess of injuries.</p><p>"Everyone gets a quick sedative to calm your asses down and the first one to oppose this gets a rectal infusion."</p><p>"This is castor oil, not a sedative."</p><p>Barbary stared a hole through Stannis's head until he gave up and just swallowed the disgusting spoonful of fish oil.</p><p>"This is what happens when you all cannot behave. Now, anyone with injuries from your little fight can see me for aspirin and band aids. Otherwise go sit somewhere until class or therapy."</p><p>Pycelle's face was brick red, his eyes bulged and his beard quivered with rage as he gave a withering gaze to the counselors.</p><p>"DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT OUR MEDICATIONS ALL COME FROM JEYNE'S FATHER? MOST OF OUR STOCKS ARE HELD BY POOLE, TYRELL, LANNISTER AND YOU ARE FIGHTING WITH OUR MONEY?"</p><p>Qyburn patted Pycelle's back and gently guided him toward a chair.</p><p>"Please remember that Olenna Tyrell not only donates her money but her time and is slated to be here today! Her grandchildren are special to her and she will listen to what they say. Luckily, she is used to you, Petyr and your domestic issues. But she won't understand why Loras was crushed by giants! This type of behavior out there has to end."</p><p>Dr. Sparrow's voice was calmer, softer than Pycelle's but no less firm.</p><p>Unella took a deep breath and gave her opinion.</p><p>"Gregor, Ramsay and Damon do not belong here. Gregor needs a more intensive program than we can offer. I would like to transfer him upstairs. As for Ramsay and Damon, call the prison and have them take them back! They are too disruptive for us to assist them."</p><p>With a sigh, Qyburn shook his head. "It's not possible. We need the numbers and the pay."</p><p>"So we've chosen money and numbers over the actual health and care of our patients and staff? Wonderful. That is going to be an excellent excuse in the newspapers when Gregor murders me and Damon and Ramsay rape and flay Theon alive."</p><p>The elevator doors slid open and Olenna entered the ward with a determined step as if heading into a pleasant battle.</p>
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<a name="section0041"><h2>41. Noted</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"You will take your wife and son to your office and apologize for your barbaric behavior. I care not what lies you tell to calm her but you do it. Lysa might be impaired but she's LOUD and that's bad enough. I want her quiet, quelled and I want you to self muzzle! The only reason I agreed to your family being treated here was for the benefits but the cons are outweighing them! A single more disturbance like this and you move your family to your personal apartment until their stay is finished!"</p><p>Petyr seethed under the scathing tone but he nodded to Qyburn. Dr. Sparrow turned to stare disparagingly at Harold and Bob, who were nursing various bruises.</p><p>"I understand one of the reasons we hired you was because you were known to be the best student support men, the best at teaching how to restrain unruly disturbed teenagers. What happened?"</p><p>Without blinking or moving, without remorse, they stared at Sparrow.</p><p>"None of these patients are teenagers and so far they haven't been attacking one by one. We agree with Unella for the record by the way. Theon, Damon and Ramsay are a bad mix and it's near impossible to treat any of them together. And Gregor is clearly fighting the urge to destroy Unella. He needs to go upstairs."</p><p>"Thank you for your input and recall what we told Unella. Good. I want anger management intervention. I want social flooding. I want those problem heads worked HARD. Hear me, therapists? Do your jobs, please. Unella, if you truly feel that you cannot work with Gregor, I will give him to another but you'll have to assist Barbary instead."</p><p>Unella stared at Qyburn, aghast.</p><p>"Never! We do not go into each other's territory, you know that. I will handle Gregor for now. I just hope you don't regret it. And I still say that Barbary needs to be watched with the meds!"</p><p>Dr. Sparrow clapped his hands quickly.</p><p>"There. It is noted how you all feel about Nurse Barbary, our patients and we appreciate your input. Now please gently but firmly shove your opinions up your asses and do your jobs. You have finally pricked even MY temper and that is hard to do."</p><p>Olenna removed her sunglasses and put them into her HERMES bag and patted her elaborate bun on her head as she walked through the lobby. Her carefully done eyebrows rose higher as she took note of how many of the patients seemed to be injured or icing bruises. Narrowing her eyes, her contacts almost melted under the heat of her gaze, seeing delicate Loras injured.</p><p>Barbary saw Olenna, gave a disinterested grunt but the gossip gleam in her rheumy eyes gave her longing away.</p><p>"I'm going to get the key to the storeroom for ya, hon. One minute."</p><p>Giving a censuring cluck of her tongue, Olenna ignored her grandchildren and headed straight for Barbary.</p><p>"What the hell happened? Did the good doctors decide a patient fight club would be helpful? Did that big Clegane decide to attack everyone? Or those two men that look like jackals, hungry ones? Hmm, apparently I sent my grand-twins at the wrong time."</p><p>Barbary grinned and shrugged as she led Olenna into the storeroom and shut the door behind them. They shared a good moment of gossip while Barbary slipped Olenna some THC/CBD pills and Olenna gave Barbary a bottle of antique bourbon.</p><p>"There are four bottle of this nasty stuff my husband enjoyed. You keep making those pills and I'll keep offering his booty. Now let's get out there and don't drop my teacups!"</p><p>Marge and Loras stood hand in hand outside of the storeroom door but Olenna ignored their forlorn looks.</p><p>"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen! I am Olenna Tyrell, here to offer you a unique form of therapy. We shall paint our own teapot and cups then have an amazing tea party. Please, all interested follow me to the arts and crafts room."</p>
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<a name="section0042"><h2>42. Tea Time</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>She by Green Day</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Olenna did not acknowledge her desperate grandchildren while she set up her items in the crafts room. Barbary put a long table up in the room and helped Olenna cover it in a tablecloth.</p><p>Jeyne jumped up and down before poking Cersei's arm as they all followed into the crafts room. "See that tablecloth? I helped make it when Olenna came three years ago! See, my name is right there on the left corner! And see all the painted purple flowers on the center, off center? Those are mine!" Cersei looked down at Jeyne with one raised eyebrow. "Three years ago, you say? You stop by here often then?" With a cheeky grin, Jeyne replied, "Every chance I get!"</p><p>"You have a full house today, O. And you won't believe it's more than your grand kids, you have some elite company, make you feel right at home. You can talk all fancy and you won't even notice Meryn sticking his cock in your favorite tea cozy." Olenna snorted then pointed a bejeweled finger at Damon and Gregor. "A Mountain and a Hill. Please set up enough chairs for everyone, thank you. And you there, the speed bump next to the Hill, please set out these paintbrushes and paper towels, there's a good lad."</p><p>Everyone but Jaqen sat in a chair, holding a paintbrush over a teacup and saucer. He sat under the table but his paintbrush was seen hovering over the china cup as he waited with the rest for orders. "First we shall paint our cups then we shall use them for our very own little tea party. After we have our tea, we shall go outside and break these cups, shatter them. It's quite fun, I assure you. Are you ready? Let's discuss different techniques while you acquaint yourself with your paints."</p><p>Olenna wandered around the table to give assistance or a word where needed while Barbary circulated the other way to offer insults and comments of her own. Ramsay painted a scene of a rabid dog, Damon painted Theon, decapitated without eyes. Meryn's cup was so offensive that Barbary smashed it twice. Jaqen painted an elaborate lovely castle then painted over it in white to hide it. Jeyne painted her cup purple with a gold smiley face. Gregor painted his cup with Unella's skull on a black background.</p><p>Loras's cup was ivory with black calligraphy, a heartfelt apology and plea for release. "Excellent work, Loras. Too bad you didn't display this level of work during your calligraphy classes last year. Oh that's right, you couldn't concentrate on getting your letters right while you were trying to suck on the ADULT cock in your MINOR mouth. You are seventeen and I know the second I let you leave here, you'll run your tender little body right to that sleazy politician. He'll give you a fake job, fake I.D., real cash and a real STD. Forget it."</p><p>Marge's cup was delicate roses that spelled out "FUCK YOU." Cackling, Barbary offered to buy the cup from her for a dollar. Cersei's cup was a masterpiece of blue flowers on a pale pink background. Sansa made a border of gold scrolls and delicate lilacs in the center. Sansa snickered and muttered, "Looks like only you and I are taking this seriously." Cersei smiled and that's when Barbary came by and peered closer at Cersei's cup. Cackling, Barbary called over to Olenna, "This fancy bitch managed to make blue dildos on a pink asshole!"</p>
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<a name="section0043"><h2>43. Charmed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Red Solo Cup by Toby Keith</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Robin's teacup was a series of breasts, different sizes and colors, all with nipple spouts dripping milk. Lysa's teacup was Robin and Petyr's heads over and over.</p><p>Stannis drew very accurate boats on his cup. Olenna painted birds flying past a sunset and Barbary painted cat faces on her cup.</p><p>Olenna explained the different kinds of tea she had and the benefits of each. Everyone picked a tea and it was served along with biscuits that Olenna said her chef made.</p><p>"If I bring a single crumb back, ladies and gents, my chef will go apocalyptic. I am afraid you simply must finish all of them, please. I find it an extreme nuisance to deal with irate servants. You understand, Cersei, don't you? I know Lysa does."</p><p>Lysa nodded frantically as she kept watch over Robin as he started to join a conversation with Stannis.</p><p>"I hate whispering servants and ones that steal, oh, I could tell you stories...and young pretty servants that wanted my poor handsome son or my husband!"</p><p>Cersei forced a charmed look upon her face and her voice was as light as a flaying blade.<br/>
<br/>
"My servants are very loyal and well paid by my husband and myself, I am lucky I guess. Sansa, what a lovely cup you've made! How traditional and classic of a look. Marge, it's perfect as expected. Jeyne...honey...what happened?"</p><p>Jeyne's hands were stained purple and she proudly held up the tea cup and saucer both a bright shade of purple with a gold childish smile and wide happy eyes.</p><p>They all drank a bit of tea, including Meryn though he had to borrow a staff mug. Olenna was excellent at small talk that did not go personal but allowed them each to feel a sense of normalcy.</p><p>Cersei wanted nothing more than for the old biddy to leave. She couldn't mess up Marge in front of her grandmother, after all. Also, Sansa was flushed and sweaty, staring at her in a rather disturbing way.</p><p>The doctors filed out of the conference room followed by the clearly shaken counselors. Qyburn looked pointedly at the patients all sitting with the two elderly ladies and back at his counselors.</p><p>"If one ancient nurse and an ancient socialite can drink tea with all our patients calmly, I don't see why the group of you couldn't even manage breakfast. See if you all can't try to keep this same kind of peace."</p><p>Petyr forced a smile onto his face and he headed to retrieve his family.</p><p>"Please excuse the interruption but I'd like to speak with my wife and step son."</p><p>Olenna looked up innocently and responded kindly.</p><p>"Ah, of course, Petyr. Would you like some calming tea or would you like to try and smash a cup against the patio? I daresay, its much better than smashing your family. No? Hmm." Petyr turned a bit red but he simply tilted his head then hurried his family out of the room.</p><p>"Well now, if everyone is done drinking their tea? Let's get to the smashing."</p><p>Olenna and Barb went first, each thinking of something that angered them. Olenna thought of how her grandchildren are acting, how her son isn't even attempting to help and hurled her cup at the patio brick wall.</p><p>Barb thought of the therapists and threw her cup. They smashed satisfyingly and Jeyne hurried to be next. Her cup broke and she cheered while leaping into the air. Loras and Marge thought of Olenna and slugged their cups at the wall together.</p><p>Sansa thought of her parents and her cup crashed loudly and it felt wonderful. Stannis threw his with a good force and smiled grimly at the shards everywhere. Jaqen's smashed out of nowhere and Ramsay lobbed his so the shatter would spray as far as possible.</p><p>Gregor thought of Unella as he threw his cup and it shattered into dust upon impact. Damon thought of Theon and threw his cup at him.</p>
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<a name="section0044"><h2>44. Empty Words</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Fake It by Seether<br/>Little Conversations by Concrete Blonde</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"What I don't understand is how I leave long enough to visit the mainland to see my own therapist and come back to hear of a royal rumble." Varys sipped at his vanilla chai, fending off the herd of counselors by nearly throwing a box of crullers at them.</p><p>"Here, you damned vultures. I refuse to indulge in any mainland gossip until I understand what happened here. Why is everyone injured? Did I miss Olenna's visit? Was today her tea painting class? Talk, talk or I take back my pastries!"</p><p>Varys had to listen very carefully and distastefully since all of them answered at once while stuffing their faces. Varys was being told the morning's events while being pelted with small bits of chewed up food.</p><p>Plus they all spoke at the same time on the same subject but in different sequences. It was revolting, maddening and ultimately not worth it. When class had ended, Olenna bade everyone to help her clean up and she tried to evade her grandchildren.</p><p>Barbary helped by getting in the way and before Marge and Loras knew it, their grandmother was out of reach. Banging on the nurse's medication room door did no good.</p><p>Barbery put a small blue sign that said she'd gone for coffee in the window and snapped the shutters closed, locked. The ladies shared some pills and bourbon in a special drink while they waited for Olenna's ride to show.</p><p>They joked about having to send Olenna out the window like a starlet hiding from paparazzi but the staff started to get to their patients day.</p><p>"Marge and Loras were just dragged off to therapy, you are safe for the moment, O. But I have to say, I wanted to see you go out the window. Haven't seen you have to do that in ages, right? Okay, off with you, ancient hoe."</p><p>"Snaggle toothed swamp creature of the trailer park, just keep that lip zipped. No one wants to hear about our glory days. Take care of my grandkids, Barb. I can't let Loras run off with a Republican Pedophile while Marge mutilates herself. I know they think this is harsh but I  need them to understand I mean business. They will not risk their lives just because they are dramatic teenagers."</p><p>Lysa was both tearful and mutinous as Petyr led her and Robin away from the others. "I am man enough to admit to my mistakes, to those I love. I am sorry, Lysa, Robin. I lost my temper and struck at you both when it was my own failings I was angry at. Please, allow me to start again and please be patient with a learning husband, father and therapist?"</p><p>"Oh Petyr, we always forgive you! You know that, don't we, Robin?" The slight boy that was almost a man nodded as he tried to wrap himself around his mother. "Yes, but I don't want you to hit me anymore! At all. Can I still nurse if I forgive you?"</p><p>"You cannot nurse anymore at all, Robin. Whether you forgive me or not, you may never nurse again. It's not allowed here or at home. But if you forgive me then I might have a present for you and your mother." Petyr's wheedling voice caused an instant reaction in both Robin and Lysa. Both came closer, eyes shining with curious greed.</p><p>A strange murderous child deep within them is what Petyr always thought of and he forced away a shiver. "Daddy Petyr, I forgive you, can I have the present?" With a pleased smile at both of them, he announced, "I have decided to move you both into my apartments."</p><p>They stared at each other then back at Petyr, not understanding. "But darling, we own a big house, we could just go there. Go back to seeing you after work and weekends like normal families. Why your little apartment here?" Petyr smiled.</p><p>"Because you and Robin still need to finish your program here. But you can sleep and have breakfast with me and come here only during the day. Doesn't that sound better?" Robin didn't see it as any real kind of win but by the shriek, his mother did.</p><p>"Oh Petyr, was it hard to be away from us like this? Don't worry, we will be with you more than ever now. Yes, of course we will be thrilled to move into the apartment. I can't wait for more time with you." Petyr smirked and hugged Lysa.</p><p>"I must attend to work now, Lysa. Please, obey the rules and do the work, okay? I will see you in just a bit. Robin, you too. Behave, young man." Watching them walk away, Petyr knew he couldn't take anymore.</p><p>This week was the time Petyr has allotted himself to decide which one of them lives or dies. He has acquired the poisonous mix he needs to kill. Now it's a matter of deciding which one of them cannot be healed and must be put down.</p><p>Marge expounded at length to Unella about how her grandmother gave her everything but the opportunity to be heard. She explained how her guilt over her parents death wasn't even allowed to be spoken of.</p><p>Just after getting to the part of the story where Marge started middle school and her parents ignored all her talent shows was when she heard the discreet snore. After Marge tactfully coughed to wake up Unella, she went to take a bubble bath and self soothe.</p>
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<a name="section0045"><h2>45. Lavender Shades</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Wish I Were Born In Beverly Hills by Alice Cooper<br/>The Purple People Eater by Sheb Wooley</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Marge didn't notice her door had been slightly askew. She also didn't notice the looks of Cersei, Sansa and Gregor as she entered. They patiently waited nearby, hearing the girl get ready for her bath. Sansa spoke quietly as they loitered near Marge's door.</p><p>"Judging by her face as she stormed by, Marge didn't have a good therapy session. So she's already annoyed, this will destroy her."</p><p>Sniffing, Cersei slipped another pill from her ring and headed towards the cafeteria.</p><p>"I am going to get some juice then wander back. Don't just stand right there or when she goes ballistic, you'll be blamed."</p><p>The screams started soon after, just as the counselors started to set up for the next big class.</p><p>Barbary rinsed the girl over and over but there wasn't much she could do. The dye that was hidden within the bubble soap has turned the girl's skin a lavender shade. </p><p>The hair remover hidden within the shampoo bottle has removed most of Marge's auburn locks and her toothpaste turned her teeth black.  </p><p>Marge knew who did it and when Cersei gave her a smirk, Marge screamed it.</p><p>"THAT CUNT DID THIS TO ME! DO SOMETHING! IT'S NOT FAIR THAT SHE GETS AWAY WITH IT! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT WHAT THAT BITCH DID TO ME! I ONLY BORROWED A FEW THINGS AND THIS IS WHAT YOU DO? ARE YOU A FUCKING MONSTER?"</p><p>Cersei smiled and trilled, "Darling, I'd say you look like the monster." </p><p>Unella gave Marge a sympathetic look.</p><p>"Marge, I do believe you but there is nothing I can do without proof. As a mean girl, you know how this works. Please don't start a war. Why don't you concentrate on your mental health. We can get you a nice hat for your head and I am sure the skin color will fix itself soon."</p><p>"I AM PURPLE, BALD AND MY TEETH ARE BLACK! CALL OLENNA AND I WANT TO GO HOME IMMEDIATELY. THIS IS ASSAULT, CALL MY LAWYER, CALL THE POLICE!"</p><p>Meryn came out of his room and he gasped loudly.</p><p>"Oh god, let me touch your skin, I want to lick your head!"</p><p>The burst of laughter was more than Marge could bear.</p><p>"YOU ARE ALL FUCKING MONSTERS JUST LIKE HER! I HATE ALL OF YOU I WOULD KILL YOU ALL IF I COULD! FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU!"</p><p>Marge ripped away from Unella and ran into her room, slamming the door so hard a crack appeared. They could hear her sobbing in frustrated rage.</p><p>Cersei scratched her ear and her arms while savoring the moment. Jeyne came by when she heard Marge yelling. Now she looked at Cersei and tilted her head.</p><p>"Does that rash itch? Maybe you should get some of that pink itch cream?"</p><p>Cersei ran past Jeyne to the nearest bedroom mirror.</p><p>"Well, don't you look lovely with those red tiny bumps. Are we sharing diseases as a therapy or a kink? Leaving? Pity."</p><p>Ramsay watched as Cersei ran back out of his room. Screaming for the nurse, she started to bang on the medicine window.</p><p>"My medication has given me a rash! I need a doctor visit and a cream immediately! I know you are in there!"</p>
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<a name="section0046"><h2>46. Slick</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Push by matchbox twenty</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As Barbary was slathering cream on Cersei's rash, Marge came rushing up to point in the blonde's face.</p><p>"This isn't over, you evil witch! Oh! How I wish I could take credit for your rash but I can't. But I'll get you, don't worry, I will get you."</p><p>Arching one eyebrow, Cersei managed to look bored to death and her voice reflected this.</p><p>"Yes, dear. That's nice. You think positive. It will help your formerly pretty head. You never know, it might be a trend setter? Being purple and half bald might be a nice look for rich teenage girls at elite schools? Surely. Now lovey, this was NICE of me, this was me being CHARITABLE in my lesson to you about stealing. Never ever touch my items again, girl. Or instead of losing hair, you might lose your eyesight. Instead of being purple you might swell up and be unable to breathe."</p><p>Loras grabbed his sister's arm and pulled her away into his loving arms.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I was in therapy and didn't know! How could that woman be so mean? Look at you! We shall go call grandmother immediately. Let's go find the doctors!"</p><p>Ignoring any counselors, they searched out a doctor. They went through each doctor and none of them seemed willing to call Olenna. Since the dye and hair loss doesn't actually affect Marge's health they saw no need.</p><p>Stannis found himself enjoying the outside work detail. He sought and received a kind of peace, listening to the roar of the waves, rooting in the dirt, digging up carrots. Theon was nearby working in the lettuce row and he also seemed at peace working outside.</p><p>Jeyne was dancing in the tiny fruit garden, pirouetting in between picking fruit. Bob snoozed on a bench in the former smoking area.</p><p>Frowning, Petyr looked at his clipboard, at the group and then went out of the room. "Excuse me, Unella? Have you seen Damon and Ramsay? We are starting the anger management class now. They are most certainly supposed to be in it."</p><p>None of the other counselors or doctors had seen the violent pair. Barbary was the one to question if they might be outside.</p><p>A slight sound, like a grunt and Stannis looked up to find Theon missing. He called his name but got no response. Stannis stood up straight and looked over at Jeyne.</p><p>"Have you seen where Theon went?" Jeyne nodded. "Yes! Ramsay and Damon just took him away. I don't think Theon wanted to go."</p><p>She spun away and Stannis ran to wake up Bob.</p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0047"><h2>47. Dumpster Days</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>One second Theon was weeding, the next he was on his back behind a stinking metal dumpster.</p><p>Seagulls shrieked and flapped above, a large hand crushed his mouth and nose, he could barely breathe. Theon couldn't scream or move, hands pinned him down and raucous laughter above him, hands everywhere, it was intolerable.</p><p>A fist slammed into his stomach, one to the face and a boot to his head took care of any last defiance. Senses reeling, Theon clutched his head and tried to curl up as he huskily begged for them to stop. A cheery Damon started to rip off his pants and Theon tried to run.</p><p>"Oh no, our little fuck boy is trying to get away. What's the matter, soldier, don't want to take one for the team? You never do, that's part of your problem. No one ever mattered as much as you and what you want. Well, this is what I want, what Rams wants and you shall suffer it."</p><p>Ramsay dropped down his knees landing square on Theon's stomach. He was as dementedly cheery as Damon was. Theon was grateful they weren't holding his mouth and nose anymore.</p><p>All his air went out of him in a hot gush until Ramsay moved off his stomach and onto his chest.</p><p>"If you try and scream, I'm going to shove my whole fist down your throat."</p><p>Theon nodded and hurled a fistful of dirt up at Ramsay's face, hoping to twist and toss him off. Damon's large boot started to kick him again and Ramsay wiped his face calmly.</p><p>"Bad boy. Guess he's a shy guy, maybe he's a virgin, Damie?"</p><p>Damon stopped kicking and gave Theon a wide grin.</p><p>"You a virgin, little solider boy? Hmm? Never got your backdoor cherry popped? Isn't this special for you then?"</p><p>Theon's senses were reeling but he was frozen in pain and panic. The shame was already rising and the guilt even though this wasn't his fault. Fine, he owed Kyra he understood that but to let these two monsters rape him?</p><p>It took everything for Theon to start trying to struggle as they ripped his pants off and undid their own.</p><p>"NO! PLEASE PLEASE!"</p><p>Theon managed to squeak out, scream out in a high pitched voice. Both men laughed and easily flipped him so his face slammed into fresh seagull shit and pavement. He felt his nose crunch and a tooth come loose.</p><p>His stomach churned and he started to vomit while Damon tried to shove himself into Theon's ass while Ramsay held him down.</p><p>"I don't think Theon wants to have sexy time with you guys."</p><p>Ramsay and Damon looked up, pausing and Theon gasped, looking up entreatingly. Jeyne swayed to the music in her head but her doe eyes pinned the three of them.</p><p>"Go away, Jeyne. Please, trust me, he deserves this. Okay? Fuck off, yeah?"</p><p>"That was rude, Ramsay. I am not sure Theon deserves rape. I think you should stop and let him go."</p><p>Damon growled as he shoved himself finally inside the dry heat of Theon who screamed and scrabbled against Ramsay's hold.</p><p>"Aw, come on Jeyne, I'm already started and hard as hell. Just give me like, five minutes."</p><p>Jeyne shook her head.</p><p>"No. He's screaming, it hurts him. Get off him please. You are triggering me, Damon. I mean it."</p><p>"Fuck off! Ramsay, attack her for me. Be a buddy, please. I'm like, just inside him, don't make me stop now!"</p><p>Bob and Stannis heard Theon scream once as they ran searching the perimeter. Unella and Petyr came running out with Howard to search for Damon and Ramsay. Just then the two bullies started screaming in agony and they were easily found behind the dumpsters.</p><p>In spite of Jeyne being the hero for Theon, Harold still had to use a sedation rifle to get her to stop juggling Damon and Ramsay.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0048"><h2>48. Support Animals</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Mr. Zebra by Tori Amos</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jeyne was put into an ice bath with the help of Harold and Bob. Unella and Barbary treated Damon and Ramsay's wounds before they offered a report to the doctors that included a suggestion for chemical castration for both young violent men.</p><p>Theon was tucked into bed by Dr. Sparrow after Dr. Pycelle treated him and Dr. Qyburn sedated him. Just because Theon's father kicked him out didn't mean it could get around that they let both a Greyjoy and a military man get raped at their facility.  </p><p>Varys blinked at the monitor but he really had no idea what to do. He never dealt with anyone but staff and patients before. He rarely has to speak to any family members, he tends to hide on visitor days.</p><p>But this was even worse than that, this was his own friend as well as the brother of Cersei Baratheon. Varys loves to drink and sing karaoke with Tyrion Lannister but had never met the rest of his family.</p><p>Varys only saw Cersei during the classes he ran, he wasn't her personal therapist luckily. He gathers from Petyr that Cersei is difficult. Now here was Tyrion standing in the lobby surrounded by creatures. Varys grabbed his own bald head and nearly hissed in outrage.</p><p>"What the hell have you done? I didn't know you had all these animals with you! I thought you said you just needed to see your older sister for a minute! I'm dead if the doctors come through and see this! How dare you pull this kind of prank on me at work?"</p><p>Tyrion grinned and shrugged.</p><p>"This isn't a prank for you. It's a prank for Cersei. Well, maybe not even so much a prank as she doesn't mind animals. Cersei loves all kinds of animals as long as they are cats. Well, she does like goats on her farm, at a distance. Oh, there goes the llama, oh dear. Well, letting them all loose like this just means that they will naturally find the right person to soothe and bond to."</p><p>"Are you out of your mind? This is a clinic, a medical facility! You can't bring all these animals in here. Is that a peacock? Don't let it out of the cage..and you do anyway. I hate you. I swear that I will get you for this. Some friend you are. If I get fired, I'm moving in with you."</p><p>Tyrion opened the smaller cage that held some ferrets and then the cage full of cats.</p><p>"You know it's healthy for mental health patients to have contact with animals?"</p><p>Varys watched Meryn chase the llama into the game room and he shut his eyes briefly.</p><p>"Go visit your sister while I try and save these animals before Meryrn rapes them all. Maybe I can hide them all in a closet until you leave and can get them out of here?"</p><p>Cersei was found already playing with a Siamese cat that immediately hissed at anyone who came close. She carried the cat into the lobby where Tyrion was sitting on the couch.</p><p>"Why are you here?"</p><p>"Nice to see you too, sis. You are welcome for the cat."</p><p>"Thank you for the cat but I am sure you aren't here out of any real urge to make me feel better. Why are you here? To laugh at me?"</p><p>"Not at all. I was asked to stop in by Robert and the kids. In fact, I have this card from Myrcella and Tommen drew you a picture. Robert and Joff send their well wishes and will see you next weekend. They wanted to see you sooner but I'm afraid they have some conflicting plans. They are on a cruise with one of Robert's staff...I believe her name is Ros? So I came instead. I hope I brought enough animals for everyone on your ward. I don't want you to be singled out or bullied."</p><p>"Thank you for bringing everything including the news, Tyrion. Now get out before I encourage Gregor over there to eat you."</p><p>Tyrion laughed and kissed his sister's hand as he sauntered towards the elevator. Leaving behind a pissed off Cersei and the beginnings of chaos as the animals made themselves at home.</p><p>"HELP! MERYN IS TRYING TO RAPE A LLAMA! WHERE DID WE GET A LLAMA?"</p><p>Gregor was the only one to answer Unella's shout. He was about to try and wrestle the cattle prod from Unella until he saw what Meyrn was doing to the llama. Gregor took the cattle prod and used it on Meryn.</p><p>He decided to carry off the llama rather than Unella. Gregor named the llama Eunice and fed her fresh fruit. Unella was already moving on and shrieking over new things.</p><p>"AHH, JEYNE WAS JUST RELEASED BY A FERRET!"</p><p>Loras pulled the peacock out of harms way and Sansa began to tickle a cute dancing goat under the chin. A sad eyed doberman wandered over to Stannis and sat next to him and Lysa found herself in an agreeable argument with a finch.</p><p>Damon wrapped a ball python snake around his neck and Ramsay cooed at a red eyed rat. Theon smiled tenderly at a huge tabby cat. </p><p>Robin held tight to the chihuahua that barked at Lysa and Petyr incessantly. Marge cooed to the adorable brown rabbit and the staff knew they were outnumbered. Plus the animals came from a Lannister so what could they do?</p><p>Qyburn sighed but announced that some of the pets would have to live outdoors. Sparrow announced that when the patients graduated to the outpatient program that the pets went with them. Pycelle wondered if they could all graduate immediately rather than in a few days.</p>
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<a name="section0049"><h2>49. Double D's</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Petyr has never felt so low and one bottle of scotch that he's hoarded most of his life is now almost empty. He giggled, a sound he's never made in his life and hopes he never makes again. Does he giggle when he's drunk? He's never been drunk before and Petyr wonders how abnormal that might seem to others? </p><p>Petyr has never wanted to be drunk or drugged since he's always wanted to be in control. Until now. Now he doesn't want to be in charge, he doesn't want control, he wants escape and peace at any cost. There is no peace at work, that is to be expected. But now there is no peace at home either.</p><p>One of the main attractions to this job was having to live at it meant limited contact with his shrill wife and step son. Even when one of them landed in the clinic they weren't in Petyr's living space. And if two demanding spoiled rich mental cases weren't bad enough they now brought pets.</p><p>The finch sounded like Lysa and Robin's dog barked like it's life depended on it. Petyr was read to commit murder and it wasn't going to matter whether it was furry or human. He ran back to the clinic and locked himself in his office where he's been steadily finishing off his forty year bottle of scotch.</p><p>Petyr drowsed and dreamed of a woman with Cat's body and Sansa's face that barked and tweeted at him until he woke with a cry.</p><p>Unella has never been drugged in her whole life but if there was ever a time to try a joint this was it. That was her rationale as she took the offering from Varys. "It's the least I can do since you are on night shift tonight and I had no idea I would be flooding you with therapy animals." But Unella had argued most of them weren't even therapy animals. </p><p>None of the creatures were trained as therapy or behavioral animals and most belonged on a farm or in a zoo. However due to the name Lannister, the doctors refused to get rid of them. So the therapists had to go and purchase everything needed for these creatures and help the patients set the animals up correctly.</p><p>Unella didn't spend years in school and under the thumb of medical madman just to build animal cages and open cans of animal food. Unable to channel her frustrations out because it was her turn to do an overnight, Unella for the first time ever took Varys up on his offer for a joint. Unella knew alcohol hurt her stomach but what harm could a single joint do her?   </p><p>So far it was making her smile and giggle a little. Unella knew if any of the patients saw her like this they would be very alarmed and that was funny enough for her to giggle a bit more. Unella has never giggled in her entire life and that alone was funny enough to make tears come from her eyes and for her to hold onto her stomach.</p><p>Unella fervently hoped all the patients were asleep and that if they woke up that Petyr would handle them. She heard him enter his office an hour or so ago and it almost sounded like he was crying. That's how she knew that she was stoned and the joint had worked. She could hear Petyr crying and that was also funny as fuck.</p><p>A calm clopping sound came and Unella opened her little nursing window to see a llama standing patiently in the hallway. Opening her window she called out, "Nice try, Gregor. Come put your donkey in its pen or I'll make it into SPAM for breakfast." A grumble came from the shadows and she heard a clicking tongue. "Come on, Eunice, leave Satan in her den."</p><p>As Gregor started to walk away he began to whistle a ditty to his llama. Petyr ripped his office door open and shrieked.</p><p>"I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL MURDER THAT FINCH BY SHOVING IT DOWN YOUR THROAT, LYSA!" </p>
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<a name="section0050"><h2>50. Peaceful Night</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As soon as Unella was sure that Gregor has taken his llama outside, she ran into Petyr's office and then wished mightily she hadn't. Petyr was beyond drunk and disheveled. He was also sitting in his own wastebasket, pants down relieving himself of anything in his intestinal tract.</p><p>Petyr was giving new meaning to being unable to hold his liquor. Moaning, Petyr was clutching his stomach as he voided himself loudly.</p><p>"ARE YOU KIDDING ME? HOW UNPROFESSIONAL!"</p><p>Unella held her nose and Petyr gasped out for her to get out.</p><p>"Can't you see I need privacy, woman? Why do you smell like Varys's weed?"</p><p>Fleeing the room, Unella ran to grab the air fresheners and as many scented candles as she could find from her apartment. It wasn't enough to cover the stink of Petyr's used brandy and the weed and she headed for Cersei's room.</p><p>"What is the meaning of this Nurse Unella? Why are you ransacking my room? I beg your pardon? You break in here to steal my perfume? What kind of place is this? Where the nurses rob their patients of beauty products?"</p><p>Unella ran into Sansa's room and equally emptied it of scents and oils of every sort then she headed into Marge's room to do the same. By now everyone was up and standing around in their nightclothes, holding their noses.</p><p>Jeyne started to try and open barred windows, Stannis helping her. Damon walked over and told punched a fist through the glass right over Jeyne's head. With a holler, Cersei moved Jeyne over and ordered Marge to pick all the glass from Jeyne's head.</p><p>Sansa coughed and grabbed a bit of her robe to cover her face with. </p><p>"Nurse, what happened? Who got sick?"</p><p>Unella frowned and started to hand out candles and air fresheners in a drugged haze.</p><p>"Counselor Petyr is unwell."</p><p>Damon and Ramsay pulled out lighters and turned into fire breathing dragons up and down the hallways. This caused Unella to screech since she was unable to find an appropriate solution under her current state of mind.</p><p>Gregor pulled out one of the fire extinguishers and he hurled it at the laughing fiery men. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0051"><h2>51. Animal Testing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Because I Got High by Afroman<br/></p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Do you think my perfume can help? It's really fancy and expensive, I bought it myself!"</p><p>Jeyne held up the discount family size bottle of Jean Nate to Cersei, who fought against making the sign of the cross at it.</p><p>"No dear, I don't believe we are allowed to test subpar chemicals on humans. Why don't you give that to Marge, I'm sure she could use some new signature stenches. She's running out of mine apparently."</p><p>Sansa pouted and seemed to be pawing through Unella's cache of stolen scents.</p><p>"Hey, these are yours, Cersei! And this one is mine, I was wondering where that lemon fragrance went!"</p><p>"I can't believe that young woman is this stupid. To blatantly continue to steal from me? Purple and half bald was not enough of a lesson? Very well. I can make my meaning clearer, my word louder for her. No problem at all, barely an inconvenience."</p><p>Unella came running out of the men's rooms now, carrying Axe and Old Spice. The women uneasily started to head towards an open window. Theon stood next to the broken window holding the tabby nearly out the hole.</p><p>"These chemicals can't be healthy for the animals!"</p><p>Jeyne responded by pulling her ferret out of her hair and throwing it out the window, then she threw Theon's cat out the window. Theon screamed and started to yell about getting outside to save his cat.</p><p>Loras leaned out the window and commented that the cat and ferret seem to be releasing the other outdoor creatures. Gregor sighed and used the code he stole from Unella to open the pantry door and head into the yard.</p><p>He had grown bored of beating on Ramsay and Damon after he heard bones break and now wanted his llama to soothe him. Opening the door to allow Eunice to enter, he ignored the fact that all the animals followed them back in.</p><p>Petyr heard the worst thing he could imagine.</p><p>"Mommy, this is not fair. Daddy Petyr should have let me stay here with all the fun. Everyone is up and the animals are everywhere! I am glad my rat is on my shoulder to see all this! Oh, look, I want to ride the giant's funny horse. I WANT TO RIDE THE FUNNY HORSE! WHERE IS DADDY PETYR AND WHAT IS THAT REALLY AWFUL SMELL?"</p><p>He was helpless on the overflowing bucket as the door swung open slowly and a horrified mother and son stood there. Even the bird on Lysa's right shoulder and the rat on Robin's left shoulder looked horrified.</p><p>Lysa's mouth seemed to open in slow motion right along with Robin's and Petyr burst into tears as the screaming commenced.</p>
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<a name="section0052"><h2>52. Late Party</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm So Excited by Pure Energy</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harold and Bob showed up first, just in time to see a llama trot by wearing a ferret for a hat and a tabby cat on its back.</p><p>Qyburn saw Meryn first, who was jacking off onto a fluffy bored rabbit while he stared dreamily at a doberman that stared back sadly.</p><p>Thanks to Robin and Lysa keeping the door open, everyone was first assaulted by a smell before a terrible sight everyone regretted seeing and smelling. As smells and animals began to run amok, the rest of the staff were woken and came out clutching robes to their noses.</p><p>Varys stared at Unella sobbing in the kitchen and he shook his head.</p><p>"Oh dear. Why didn't you tell me you didn't react well to THC?"</p><p>"I never tried it before! I had no idea this would happen! Animals, fires...ahh, gods, I WILL GET FIRED AND POLICE WILL ARREST ME AND PETYR IS SHITTING TO DEATH! ARE THE POLICE COMING, WHAT IS THAT, WHO IS THAT?" </p><p>A Siamese cat hissed at her from a shelf above her and Unella screamed. Unella ran into the pantry and hid behind the area that they kept the raincoats and boots.</p><p>Varys sighed as Pycelle narrowed his eyes at him and Sparrow shook a finger in Varys's face. </p><p>"Didn't we discuss you offering your special blends of flower to others at work?"</p><p>Loras and his peacock were trying to help a tearful purple and half bald Marge find her missing rabbit. Theon was calling for his tabby while Stannis was worrying for his doberman. A finch flew in dizzying circles around the heads of enraged albino twins trying to put out any actual fires.</p><p>Barb had taken one small peek at the chaos and knew she would need help putting things to right. She stood near the elevator watching everyone run around and waited for Olenna to show.</p><p>Jaqen and his chameleon were wearing identical lamp shades as they carefully slid past the older woman who snapped her gum at them and rolled her eyes. The elevator slid open and Olenna thumped her cane down as she entered, her velvet housecoat swirling around her.</p><p>"What fresh hell is this? Barb, who just went stupid around here? I'm going to shove my cane up some asses!"   </p><p>Her threats were drowned out by Marge's horrified screech.</p><p>"MERYN CAME ALL OVER ASIA!"</p><p>Even Petyr in his worst moments muttered he wasn't surprised but unsure how Meryn would have managed getting a passport. Then he passed out in his own feces and brandy. That's when Lysa staggered backwards and screamed.</p><p>"CALL A REAL DOCTOR, A REAL HOSPITAL! MY HUSBAND POISONED HIMSELF! HE DRANK MY FIRST HUSBAND'S SCOTCH! PETYR, WHY WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING SO STUPID! I LOVE YOU, I WILL SAVE YOU! ROBIN, HELP ME GET YOUR FATHER UP, WE NEED TO SAVE HIM!"</p><p>"Eww, Mother, he's covered in POOP! I don't want to touch POOPY!"</p><p>Pycelle, Qyburn and Sparrow were bristling over the insults but they were trying to asses Petyr. Barbary and Olenna put on gloves and face masks, wading into the chaos like tanks through war.</p>
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<a name="section0053"><h2>53. Winning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bad Medicine by Bon Jovi</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Olenna waded through the human and animal wreckage as if she were a general in a Hollywood created war. In a year before technicolor, Olenna was a baton girl and her arthritic hands now practiced old moves with her solid oak cane.</p><p> Olenna cracked Meryn hard enough on his penis to make him reconsider the rape of the peacock he was trying to catch. She moved on as he skidded to curl into a ball sobbing in the hallway. Right behind her was Barbary ready to deliver healing which is why she offered Meryn a butterscotch candy.</p><p>Olenna smacked Eunice out of her way and found Damon holding his left arm and complaining of being crushed to death by Gregor Clegane. Barbary discovered Ramsay under a sad looking doberman and declared him broken. He also received a butterscotch.</p><p>Harold and Bob began to escort the injured to triage rooms for the nurses and doctors. Unella managed to creep back inside with Varys's help and with Barbary began to deal with injuries.</p><p>Once Petyr was stable and put into a private surgery upstairs away from the unit, Pycelle and Sparrow came to repair what the nurses couldn't. The tally afterwards was pitiful.</p><p>Pycelle held onto his broken ribs with great dramatic significance as he listed the latest catastrophe.</p><p>"Damon has a concussion as well as a broken left arm. Ramsay has several fractures and has been transferred upstairs. He will spend time recovering after some minor surgeries by Qyburn then be back on the floor. I am not willing to call Bolton until we've completed the surgeries. Petyr is being flushed of the poison but he's quite weak and ill. It will take some time for him to heal and until then he shall remain a roommate of Ramsay's. Both shall be delighted."</p><p>The staff all stood before him now that all animals and patients have been medicated and put to bed. Pycelle glowered at Unella, who squirmed and stared at her feet. Then she looked over to make sure no one was stealing the elevator. SIghing, Pycelle shook a finger in Varys's face.</p><p>"When I said you may grow medicinal grade weed, I didn't mean for you to sell it to paranoid cat ladies! Damn you, man! Is this why you were late with my drop off? You KNOW how my arthritis acts up! I've waited so that Jane Austen could have a breakdown and let the patients run amok! Shame on you, Sir, for shame!" </p>
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<a name="section0054"><h2>54. The Clean Up Game</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"We can't go to the police! Stannis is a high profile homicide detective and can't be seen here!"</p><p>"In fact, there's Cersei Baratheon to consider, his own sister in law. Just because they choose to ignore each other doesn't make their relation any less. We have too many rich or connected clientele here for calling police or other facilities at all, really."</p><p>"We are on our own to make these difficult decisions. But we must make these choices for the good of our facility and for what best serves our clients."</p><p>
  <strong>Three disreputable doctors stood in a circle and debated the fates of all like a bad Greek comedy.</strong>
</p><p>"Lysa murdered her first husband and now Petyr almost dies the same way. She's a murderess and must be in jail, must go to a court of law and be judged."</p><p>"Petyr won't thank us for that kind of exposure nor will any one else here or their families."</p><p>"Do not forget the condition of two certain young men. Violent or not, they were put here in one condition and would be seen in another! Never mind the larger names at stake here!"</p><p>
  <strong>They nodded and bristled and looked indignant and certain of the unknown.</strong>
</p><p>"I say we must deal with this personally here at the facility. We have handled worse."</p><p>"Why have the clients bothered by this at all when it can be all handled quietly, privately?"</p><p>"Clients will not complain. Who enjoyed Lysa or Robin? Does Theon love the company of Bolton or his boy? Send for the albinos to deal with it. It is enhancement free of charge. Roose should be grateful. And Damon can only benefit from a more aggressive medication regime."</p><p>Congratulating themselves on another winning meeting of the minds, the three doctors were ready to clean up their messes. During the early morning hours, when not even Lysa's finch was awake, something terrible happened in Petyr's apartments.</p><p>Robin had a nightmare about breastfeeding and having the milk go bad in his mouth but his mother wouldn't let him go and he was drowning in pus and chunky milk. This sent him into the bathroom to vomit, a fever raging in his head and body.</p><p>As the boy started to shit uncontrollably on the toilet, he noticed his mother hanging in the shower from his favorite belt. Screaming his mother's name did nothing, poisoned filth spilled down his legs as he tottered towards his swinging mother. </p><p>He reached for her legs but missed and smacked his head into the tiles, staining them red and brown. Both were found dead about ten minutes before breakfast. Without a shred of laughter, the doctors listed both Lysa and Robin's deaths as natural.</p><p>Damon sat at breakfast shaking and hugging his snake like it was a teddy bear. When Theon made eye contact, the man burst into tears and ran out of the room. "THE FUCK WAS THAT?" Theon threw up his arms and stared after Damon then around the room as if someone had an answer for him.</p><p>Barbary came from nowhere to whack Theon in his head and squawk in his face, leaving wafts of Melba toast and Tang with vodka.</p><p>"THIS IS A BULLY FREE ZONE, GREYJOY! KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF!"</p>
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<a name="section0055"><h2>55. Morning Pick Me Ups</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bad Romance by Lady Gaga</p>
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    <p>Unella should have been suspicious that Cersei gave no complaint when she was called to assist Sansa and Stannis with breakfast today. It didn't occur to her until it was too late and Marge was clutching her throat and falling to the ground.</p><p>"What a rude way to say you don't like our cooking, young lady."</p><p>Unella sighed. "You fool no one, Cersei. What did you do? Tell me before she dies of something and you go up for murder."</p><p>"You have no sense of humor, Unella. I just added a little dandelion to the omelets. Oh, that's right, poor dear has allergies. Here, I happen to have some allergy pills right here."</p><p>"Marge, drag yourself to Barbary and get treated. I wouldn't give this girl anything of yours, Cersei. What a terrible trick to play."</p><p>Cersei gasped and helped Marge up, ignoring Unella.</p><p>"I don't know what you are implying, nurse! That I would act like some spiteful teenager to spike her meal in a way that could hurt this child? I will help you to the nurse, dear. The competent one. All you need is a butterscotch candy!"</p><p>Dragging Marge along as the girl sputtered and choked, Cersei got cheerier. Until Marge threw up on her then Cersei shoved her into the bathroom door as if she were a battering ram.</p><p>Tossing the slight girl against the sink and turning the cold water on full blast, Cersei shoved the elegant young student's head under it. "Let's get you cleaned up, pretty girl. Don't drown and let's not ruin that nice hair of yours. It's so soft and shiny, Marge."</p><p>Stannis and Sansa finished up the last of the trays then got their own. "Oh look, Jeyne is waving to us from her rather empty table. I wonder where Cersei and Marge went? Anyway, Sir, I want to apologize to you personally. What you did at the college was..."</p><p>Gruffly, Stannis cut in.</p><p>"What I did was probably quite stupid, young lady. But I have known Davos for many years and it would have ruined his reputation even though he rebuffed you. It was more believable that I would have an affair with one of our students. I only assistant teach one small class a year so it wasn't a big deal for me to leave. But Davos, it would kill him. Why did you pretend to have an interest in him anyway? Your grades weren't that bad, were they?"</p><p>Shaking her head, nodding, shrugging, Sansa smiled helplessly.</p><p>"That is the problem. I don't know. I always got all honor roll grades in high school. I go to the University and I suddenly see B's and C's and dips and I simply freaked out and all I could think was to fix it at any cost. Then I just totally shut down and went home and well, here I am. Same as you. Are you here because of the scandal? Oh no...your wife must think we are terrible! And it's not even true!"</p><p>Patting Sansa's hand as they sat down, Stannis cleared his throat gruffly.</p><p>"Don't worry about it. My nervous breakdown isn't over you. Hell, my wife advised me to sleep with you! She is currently having an affair with the last redhead I was sleeping with and they are contemplating how much they hate my daughter. I have a rather complicated life, dear."</p><p>Sansa smiled then blushed as she toyed with her food.</p><p>"You are Cersei's brother in law, right? Do you know her well?"</p><p>Stannis shook his head and Jeyne rolled her eyes. As the three of them toyed with runny eggs, Stannis volunteered a bit more.</p><p>"What I know of my sister in law. She is a vain, mean socialite who loves and spoils her children and married Robert for every reason but love. Cersei is a very passionate woman full of fury and lust and sadism! That is all I know of Cersei."</p><p>Sansa fanned herself as she ate a bite of canned peaches and nodded. "Oh. Thank you."</p><p>"Why are you soaked?"</p><p>Sansa jumped guiltily but Unella was staring at Cersei, who's expensive sweats were dripping wet. With a charitable smile, Cersei answered Unella with a sweet voice.</p><p>"Darling Marge got sick and we had to wash her and my sweats. I have delivered her to Barbary. I am going to change, don't hold breakfast for me. I don't cook well and neither do Stannis or Sansa. We all have cooks that do that for us, Nurse."</p><p>Unella huffed but then she hollered that everyone must get their meds right after breakfast. She would have supervised the medications Barb offered but that's when she noticed Gregor was carrying Eunice under his arm. And that Loras has brought his peacock inside as well. </p>
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<a name="section0056"><h2>56. Switches</h2></a>
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    <p>Unella had barely started to play tug of war with Loras and the peacock when Olenna walked up and rapped both of them quickly with her cane.</p><p>"That is enough. Unella, go to your quarters and rest. Pycelle asked me to take over your shift for the rest of today and this evening. You are back as of tomorrow. Good day to you." </p><p>Unella tried to argue but she received another rap from the cane for her troubles.</p><p>"I SAID GOOD DAY TO YOU!"</p><p>With a final huff of indignation, Unella stormed away. The peacock started to chase after her, ready to give a nip until it's long graceful neck was hooked by Olenna's cane.</p><p>"Loras, my boy. Get your damned fancy chicken under control or it will be tonight's supper for all here. Get it outside where it belongs. Gregor, young man, put that creature down and stop hand feeding it like a damned lap dog! I want the colored ostrich and the lap horse outside right now or else they go into the kitchen for processing!"</p><p>Jeyne glared at Barbary then threw the butterscotch at the nurse and snarled at her.</p><p>"Give me something to turn me purple and I want a razor to cut my hair! NOW! Not your damned gross old candy and I don't like these pills, they aren't what I usually take! We aren't getting the right stuff!"</p><p>Barbary came halfway out of her medicine window like a tanned wrinkled version of a monster. A hand came fast and caught Jeyne by her massive curly halo.</p><p>She yanked the girl close and her dentures came threateningly close and clicked near Jeyne's eyeballs.</p><p>"You won't be rude to me, chicky or I'll lay you low. The doctors have changed all the medications around and you have the right ones. The butterscotch was me being nice, you little nutcase. I have no skin dye and you aren't allowed a razor. Take your meds and get away, freak."</p><p>Cersei got in line just as Jeyne came pouting by and asked what was wrong.</p><p>"I want to be color and fashion too! I want to be purple skinned and have hair only on one part of my head! It looks really rebellious and cool, Cersei!"</p><p>"No dear, it looks awful. I made her look like that as a punishment and she hates it, Jeyne. If you do it, then she won't think its so bad anymore. We want her to feel bad, Jeyne."</p><p>Jeyne tilted her head up to stare confused at Cersei's face.</p><p>"We do? But why?"</p><p>"We do. Because Marge keeps stealing from me and won't stop. So she needs to be punished."</p><p>Cersei smiled to see a stretcher with Marge in a heated blanket, shivering, covered in hives being taken upstairs by Harold. She frowned to see Bob steer Sansa into Qyburn's office. A few moment's later she came out looking very troubled with tears in her eyes.</p><p>"It's terrible. I must call my family. I must go see Uncle Petyr! He needs me, Doctor Qyburn!" </p><p>Qyburn smiled and offered to escort Sansa.</p><p>"Since you are his only relative here, you may see him. However, we aren't making any phone calls. Petyr has expressed his need for privacy. He doesn't want it known that his wife was a murderess. Let's just leave it at a terrible accident, shall we? Just because we know the truth doesn't mean we need to announce it to all. Come, Petyr is starting to mend and will welcome his niece at his side." </p><p> </p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0057"><h2>57. Bedside Manners</h2></a>
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    <p>Cersei discovered that using Jeyne to tell gossip might not be the best idea.</p><p>Jeyne informed several clients and staff that Lysa was a Purple-ness that scotch taped her husbands and son to death before jumping off a long rope.</p><p>Jeyne was also under the impression that as Petyr's niece, Sansa must marry her uncle and no one could dissuade Jeyne of this fact.</p><p>"What is La Perla?"</p><p>Cersei was almost afraid to answer the question and rubbed her temples.</p><p>"Why do you ask, Jeyne?"</p><p>"Because Loras has been selling La Perla to Meryn and Sansa for ten minutes and I want to know if I should buy some."</p><p>A short walk confirmed that Loras was indeed offering out all of Cersei's undergarments but he wasn't selling them, he was giving them away for free.</p><p>With a charming smile, Cersei begged Jeyne prettily to save her undies from the male perverts. Jeyne smiled back before making Loras, and Meryn scream.</p><p>Sansa brought back the few pairs of undies that she got and handed them sheepishly to Cersei. Handing them over mutely, Sansa flew back to care for Petyr.</p><p>This only made Cersei begin the gossip personally.</p><p>Petyr wore several ice packs upon his numb stomach yet it grudgingly was doing flips and slow turns. Sitting on the side of his bed was the prettiest redhead that Petyr knew.</p><p>Petyr spent years with a crush on Sansa's mother, slept with and married her aunt and here was the youngest incarnate of both those ladies. And he wished nothing more than for her to leave immediately.</p><p>Since Sansa entered the lab, she's hugged Petyr, helped him sit up, drink a glass of water, plump his pillows and massaged his limbs. Oh and she's talked nonstop of Cersei Lannister. </p><p>Also, Sansa brought her goat, Lemon who enjoyed eating all of Petyr's tubes. The goat happily lapped up the morphine drip before nibbling on Petyr's catheter. In tears, Petyr prayed in vain for assistance.</p><p>Ramsay was unable to do more than feed from Petyr's misery and pray that his own morphine drip isn't attacked by the goat. His face was still bandaged along with his left leg and right arm shoulder.</p><p>He wondered why no one has called his father or put Clegane in jail. Ramsay wondered where Damon was and hoped he would gain the use of his jaw again to ask his questions.</p><p>Marge lay in a bed across from Petyr and Ramsay with a curtain drawn for privacy. She couldn't take another second of Sansa complimenting Cersei and finally managed to throw her bedpan over the curtain.</p><p>It landed on Ramsay still half full.</p>
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